


Tony's Choice

by hafital



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Dum-E deserves a medal, Fix-It, Gen, Infinity Stones magic, Not Avengers: Endgame Compliant, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Tony Needs a Hug, peter parker to the rescue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-15 17:50:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16937895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hafital/pseuds/hafital
Summary: In order for the Avengers to use the Stones to reverse the Snap, they each must make a terrible choice.“We are the gauntlet,” said Tony, looking at Clint, then at Thor and Natasha and Bruce, and finally, Steve. “What is it you keep harping on about? We do this together.Weare the gauntlet. There are six stones, and six of us. We each take a Stone.”





	Tony's Choice

**Author's Note:**

> There is a great deal of Tony angst in this story, so please bear that in mind. I was unable to fit Carol Danvers in. Just imagine she's there somewhere, kicking ass. Also, I have not seen the new trailer! Most likely this is already an AU. :D I wanted to post it before the trailer dropped but life happened and I couldn't get it done in time.
> 
> Thank you to my betas Destina and Killabeez!

“Soul holds a special place among the Infinity Stones. You might say it has a certain wisdom.”

\--The Red Skull

 

After Peter turned to dust, Tony waited. He rubbed at the dust on his hands. Above him, pieces of the wrecked planet floated in the off-kilter gravity, crashing into each other. 

“He did it,” said Nebula, her voice flat and emotionless, but when Tony looked at her metal-black eyes he saw their defeat reflected back. 

He expected either he would go next or she would, and every ache in his body, every knife-like stab of pain seemed to herald the start. He braced for it, his skin tingling. But he remained solid and whole, except for the wound at his side. The pain weighed him down, like an anchor. Perhaps that was why it was taking so long, because he was falling apart anyway. The ground shook beneath his feet, causing more of the carcass of a planet to break off into the air.

Nebula sat down near him, and they fell silent. A low breeze stirred the dust, causing the floating debris to drift silently by. Another quake shook the ground.

Staring at his hand, searching for the sign it would crumble to dust, it took him several minutes to take further notice of his only companion. He’d gotten her name earlier, during the fight with Thanos, and he understood she was like the other one—Gamora—whom Quill had cared so much for. Tony indulged in a bitter moment, cursing Quill’s name. But he knew, deep down where he couldn’t lie to himself, where the ache of his wound kept him grounded in the weak gravity, their failure hadn’t been Quill’s fault. Strange had said _fourteen million futures,_ and in each one they failed. Except for one. 

It couldn’t be this one. Strange couldn’t have meant this future. Tony hadn’t allowed himself to think of Pepper back on Earth during the entire trip to Titan, or during the fight. But he thought of her now as he stared at his hands, when he could still feel Peter turning to dust in his arms. His mind slid over what he feared most, latching on instead to her voice, cutting in and out as he lost contact, to her keeping pace with him on their run through Central Park. The way she’d looked when he’d last seen her.

Nebula examined her mechanical arm, straightening and bending it over and over again. It kept sticking half way to straightening. Tony’s curiosity got the better of him, and he shifted closer to take a look.

She glanced at him, and he realized her eyes had no pupils. They gleamed dully in the rust-colored light.

He reached for her arm and she flinched away. “Can I look?” he asked. “Maybe I can fix it.”

She took her time studying him before turning slightly to present her arm. 

“You know,” he said, figuring out how to open the metal components of the limb to see the hydraulics and gears inside. “I know someone else with a mechanical arm.” 

He didn’t know why he said it. He could hardly claim to know Barnes at all. 

She stared at the ruined landscape. “My entire body is mechanical, courtesy of my father,” she said in the same flat voice. “There are almost no organic parts remaining.”

He swallowed the dust in his throat, trying to think of something to say to that, but there was nothing. He saw where the problem was, poking at it. “It’s Nebula, right? That’s your name?” He bent and straightened her arm. “My name is Tony. Tony Stark. Since it seems we’re stuck here together.”

She turned toward him. “I know who you are.”

“How do you know me?” He stared at her, trying to stop his fingers from shaking as he fixed her arm. 

“My father,” said Nebula, and now her black eyes were locked so securely onto his that he couldn’t look away. “When he attempted to gain the Tesseract from your planet with that idiot’s help, he spoke of you often.”

Tony felt the years since New York swirling around with the dust. “Why?” he asked. “Why didn’t he just take the Tesseract himself? We probably couldn’t have stopped him. Why’d he send Loki?”

“He couldn’t move openly against Earth while Asgard remained in power. Asgard is destroyed now, and the Allfather is dead,” she said. “He was waiting, bargaining that sending Loki, and the Scepter with the Mind Stone as a hidden catalyst, would start a chain reaction to expose the other Stones. He planned each step.”

Tony digested this, and it sat like a lump of rock in his belly, knowing they’d been played since the beginning. Blood leaked out of him. Nebula didn’t move, leaving her arm in his weak grasp. 

“Can anything be done?” he asked, in almost a whisper, closing up the metal slats of her arm. 

She took her arm back, and they sat side-by-side. “I don’t know,” she said. “Not without the Stones, and someone powerful enough to command them.”

Titan creaked beneath them. Tony began to wonder how long they’d been sitting there, and how much longer they could remain. The planet was breaking apart. It had already seen better days, but with the destruction of its moon, he could only guess how long they had before it cracked down the middle. 

“We have to get off this planet,” he said. 

Nebula stood up. “Quill’s ship must be somewhere.” 

Without waiting for him, she marched off in what appeared to him to be an entirely arbitrary direction. He debated whether to follow or not, but it wasn’t like he had a choice. He pushed himself to his feet, clutching at his side. “Hey, wait up,” he called, stumbling over the broken ground. 

Nebula didn’t wait for him, but marched on determinedly. As he made his way more carefully, a sudden shift in the light occurred. He looked up and saw a swirl of cloud and light and dust, like a mini tornado, right over his head. The light increased, with a hint of rainbow in it. 

“Oh, shit,” he said, stopping where he stood, recognizing the rainbow light for what it was. “Nebula,” he called, and the urgency in his voice made her turn. Her eyes widened, and she ran back.

She wouldn’t make it in time, and maybe she wasn’t meant to. Maybe she didn’t want to, because she paused just outside the circle. 

“Stark,” she said. 

He felt the first pull of the Bifrost begin to carry him away. “Get off this planet,” he said to her. “Do what you can to fix this. Find Thanos. I….”

But then she faded into white light as he was carried away and everything became color and sound and speed. He couldn’t help but laugh, flying without his suit. The entire experience lasted fewer than mere moments before the sound and fury of the Bifrost dumped him stumbling onto a field of green grass under blue sky. 

“Tony,” cried a familiar voice, and he turned to see Rhodes rushing toward him. He’d lost count how often in his life Rhodey was there to catch him when he fell.

“We have to stop meeting like this,” he said with a weak smile. 

“You bastard,” said Rhodes, hugging him. 

Rhodes took hold of him and they moved off the Bifrost ring. Bruce was suddenly there on his other side. “Oh, you, too. Hi, Bruce,” said Tony.

“Hi, Tony,” said Bruce, softly. 

Tony saw both Natasha and Thor standing outside the circle underneath a small cluster of trees. In the background, hundreds of people—an army he didn’t recognize—milled around on a field. It took him a moment, but then he realized he must be in Wakanda. 

Nat and Thor looked so different, so changed, and he wondered briefly if it was more than just their hair. He certainly wasn’t the same as he had been before. No one spoke at first, and Tony was afraid to look around for the others, for Steve, to search for missing faces and find them gone. 

“You’re wounded,” said Bruce, unzipping Tony’s tracksuit to get a look, apologizing when he winced. 

Tony turned to Thor, taking note of the giant axe he now carried instead of his hammer. “Thanks,” he said. “But there was a woman left on Titan. Nebula.”

“Nebula’s alive?” asked a new, unfamiliar voice, and Tony glanced down to see… a walking, talking raccoon. He looked from the raccoon to Thor, to Nat and Bruce, and then back to the raccoon. The raccoon demanded, “What about Quill? Drax? Gamora?” 

“You know Quill?” asked Tony, deciding to put off dealing with the shock of a talking raccoon to another day. He sensed the others’ attention. Then he saw, just off to the side, a floating stretcher with Vision’s body laid out. He limped over despite Bruce’s objections.

“They’re my….friends,” said the raccoon. “We split up when we found the pirate angel.” A glance at Thor told Tony who the pirate angel was meant to be. “Where are they?”

Tony took a breath, staring at the gaping hole in Vision’s head where the Mind Stone had been. No one moved except for Bruce who tried to treat Tony’s wound. Tony turned back to the raccoon. “Nebula said Thanos killed Gamora when he took the Soul Stone. The others…they didn’t…they’re…I’m sorry. Except for Nebula and myself, they each…they’re gone. So are Peter Parker and Stephen Strange,” he added with a glance at Bruce. 

Sorrow flickered across Bruce’s face but he kept his attention on Tony’s side. The raccoon took the news hard, his small black hands covering his face. 

“If you’re Nebula’s friend, she’s alone,” said Tony. “On Titan. She said something about finding Quill’s ship. If you hurry, maybe you can catch her.”

The raccoon turned to Thor, who knelt by his side. Tony gazed down at Vision’s body, one part of him aware of the raccoon giving Thor some kind of communication device before Thor led him to the Bifrost ring. A moment later there was a bright light, and the raccoon was gone. It all happened in the periphery of Tony’s awareness. Vision lay gray and motionless. With him went the last bit of Jarvis. 

“Tony,” said Bruce. “We have to get this properly treated.”

His tone made Tony grimace, his expression full of concern as if he expected Tony to suddenly shoot up into the sky and disappear. Tony could still feel dust on his fingers from that planet. Then his mind corrected—not from the planet, the dust was from Peter. Tony rubbed his hands, seeking the sensation of dirt and grit. Anything. 

Bruce looked more alarmed now, glancing at Thor as if asking for back up. “Tony? Maybe you should sit down.”

He had been avoiding it since the moment the Bifrost left him on the field, but couldn’t avoid it any longer. Bruce shook his head, knowing instinctually what Tony was about to do. Tony tapped his ear bud, making sure it was functioning. “Friday. You there?”

There was a pause, and then he heard the AI’s cool, lilting voice. “Yes, boss.”

Tony’s heart was pounding. “Can you reach Pepper for me?” he asked quietly. 

Another pause, longer this time. He couldn’t stand Bruce’s sad eyes any longer so he looked at Natasha. She didn’t have any tears, but she looked at him with complete understanding, and he found he couldn’t handle that either, so he looked down at his hands instead, searching for the sensation of dust on his skin. 

“No answer, boss,” said Friday. 

“Try again.”

Another longer pause. “I can’t locate her cell phone,” said Friday. 

“Keep trying,” he said, because he had to.

Bruce said his name, his urgent tone calling for help. Tony felt someone take hold of him but he pushed them away. He wasn’t going to faint, or fall down. He just needed a moment. 

“Tony,” said a blur in front of him, and he forced himself to focus long enough to take in Steve’s face. He was alive. He was here. Steve had a beard now. Tony’s utter relief at seeing Steve alive and whole flashed bright before it was drowned again when he remembered Pepper. When he remembered Peter. 

“Hey, Cap,” said Tony, letting Steve take his weight. 

~~

Tony lost track of time. He was on the field with Steve and the others, and then he was inside a cool, dark chamber full of different technology that he wanted to inspect but couldn’t, being told to lie down. He woke with no concept of how much time had passed. 

He recognized the chamber he was in from before, but it appeared as if he were alone until a voice spoke from the shadows, making him jump.

“If you would come with me, Mr. Stark,” said the voice. A tall impressive woman stepped into the light, bald and in some kind of red uniform, holding a spear. Or what looked like a spear, but he caught signs that it was more than that. “I’ve been asked to escort you to the war council.”

“Right,” he said, haltingly, trying not to stare too much. He touched his side. The wound was completely healed with no scar left, but a dull ache inside marked the spot. The housing unit for the nanotech suit gleamed on his chest. “Thank you.”

He followed through winding corridors and into different kinds of elevators, glancing at his escort every few steps. Since Germany, since the whole break up of the Avengers and the signing of the Accords, Tony had followed the news from Wakanda. He wanted to ask after T’Challa, but was afraid of the answer. When they reached their destination, the woman turned to him. She must have seen his question on his face because she stood straighter, proud but with a weight bearing down on her shoulders. She nodded. He didn’t need to ask after T’Challa any more.

“In here,” she said, letting him enter first. 

He entered what he thought must be the throne room. It had a view of the battlefield, light streaming in, filled with people sitting or standing in a loose circle. Most were Wakandan, but he saw the Avengers grouped together at one end. The room quieted when he entered. He went to stand beside Rhodey and Steve, and faced the room. It wasn’t until that moment that he noted the lack of Sam Wilson among the others. 

“Bruce was just bringing us up to date on what happened to the Asgardians,” Steve said, all business. “I think we need to understand as much as we can of what happened.” 

With an awkward glance at everyone, Bruce filled them in. He started with the destruction of Asgard, and how Thanos had found them shortly after, taking the Tesseract. When he finished his part in the tale, ending with Strange being taken with the Time Stone, Steve took over and explained how they’d gone after Vision. Thor spoke next. Then they all turned to Tony. 

He noticed the startlingly life-like holograms of individuals he recognized and several he didn’t—government officials, rulers, military personal, royal family members. They’d even tracked Clint Barton down, and his hologram floated next to Natasha. Among them was a hologram of Secretary Ross, looking even more constipated than usual. 

Tony recounted what he could of the trip to Titan, of the arrival of Quill and his friends, of Strange’s examination of the timelines, of the fight with Thanos. It took less time than he would have expected to piece together the whole story. Twenty minutes to recount how half of all life in the universe was wiped out with a snap. “We threw everything we had at him. I threw everything I had at him. Barely made a scratch. When he was about to take me out, Strange stopped him. Offered him the Time Stone for my life.”

There was an immediate uproar, full of questions and cries of disbelief. Steve shouted until everyone quieted again. 

“Wasn’t my call,” said Tony. “And Strange isn’t around to tell us why he made it.”

Everyone began speaking again, louder than before. The volume in the room rose, but it was like a buzzing in his ears, and Tony tuned it out. He stepped away, turning to the window and the view of the battlefield. There were immense gashes carved into the landscape, and giant threshers toppled over on their sides.

Behind him the debate continued, but he didn’t take part. As he saw it, only one choice lay ahead, and eventually everyone would come to the same conclusion. Thor’s booming voice shouted everyone down until silence reigned in the room again. 

“Thanos is wounded,” said Thor, his voice bouncing off the walls of the throne room. “Before he vanished…I buried my axe in his chest.”

“But you didn’t kill him,” said a derisive voice, and Tony didn’t have to turn around to recognize Secretary Ross.

“No,” said Thor. “I failed. I’m not denying that. He is difficult to kill. However, the point is that he’s currently wounded. He might not remain so. If we wait too long, if we let this opportunity pass, we probably won’t get another.” With creased brows, he shook his head. “And there’s something else. When he used the gauntlet, before he disappeared, I saw that it was damaged. We have to consider the possibility that it’s too damaged to work again.”

Silence fell until Steve took in a deep breath. “You’re saying we have a narrow window,” he said.

“No,” said Secretary Ross. “He’s saying, anything we manage to do might be futile, anyway.”

More silence. Then Steve addressed the room. “I know this is hard. We’ve lost more than any of us can say. More than… we even know. But this isn’t over. We lost this battle. We have to be ready for the next one.”

“But he can be anywhere,” said a new voice, and Tony turned to recognize the warrior who’d escorted him. “How do we find him?”

In his ear, Friday spoke up, quietly. “That’s General Okoye, boss. She leads the Dora Milaje, and is the head of the Wakandan Armed Forces.”

Tension uncoiled inside him, knowing Friday was with him. He’d heard of the Dora Milaje. He couldn’t help but notice that only Okoye and one other wore the red uniform. She stood beside the throne that remained empty. Beside her, other Wakandans stood around the throne, protecting it. 

“Nebula will find him,” said Tony, and everyone turned to him. “Thanos killed her sister. And, it doesn’t seem like he was a great dad. She’s highly motivated. She’ll find him. Thor’s raccoon friend will get in touch when she does. We should be ready. Thor’s right. Might be the only chance we get.”

He walked to the center of the room. Steve picked up on his cue, and the other Avengers lined up on either side of him and Steve. “If we’re doing this, we’re doing this together,” Steve said to the room. “Avengers? It’s time to assemble.”

~~

In the critical moment, Iron Man and Thor pinned Thanos down. Weakened and wounded, Thanos slammed Tony down into the ground, then tossed Thor aside. It left Thanos vulnerable long enough for Nebula to take Gamora’s sword and stab him through the heart. 

Thanos cried out, then turned to look at her. Nebula was breathing hard, but she stood her ground as she withdrew the sword, slicing down. Thanos staggered, but did not fall. The new wound was added to the old wound, creating a giant X across his chest.

“None of you will ever learn,” said Thanos as the other Avengers closed in, Tony and Thor recovering to stand with them. Thanos raised the gauntlet. 

Tony and Thor yelled together, preparing to attack, but as Thanos made a fist the gauntlet cracked, sending out a shock wave of power and light. Everyone lifted their arms up to shield their faces until it was over. In the next instant the gauntlet began to disintegrate. 

“No,” cried Thor, but it was too late, and the pieces of the gauntlet fell to the ground, the Stones glittering. They looked innocent and colorful nestled in the dirt and the grass and rocks, the bits of metal from the gauntlet keeping them from touching the earth. Even Thanos stood stunned, not certain what to do next. Then Nebula swung her sword, slicing through Thanos’s neck. His shocked expression remained frozen as his head toppled, then fell and rolled away. In the next moment, his body crumbled, shaking the ground. 

“Don’t touch the Stones,” said Thor, his voice rough. Tony looked at him, and then at the others. His armor began to retract into its housing. “They are harmful to mortals.”

Steve turned to Thor. “Is there another gauntlet? Or can another be made?”

Thor furrowed his brow. “Perhaps,” he said. “Eitri made this one. Thanos took his hands to make sure he would never make another, however he was able to make my axe. It’s possible.”

Thor’s hesitation didn’t fill Tony with a lot of hope. “That’s going to take too long,” he said.

“What are our options?” asked Natasha. 

“I’m with Tony on this one,” said Clint. Tony had found it impossible to look at Clint since his return. Each time Tony had, all he saw was Clint’s pain and loss of his entire family, too similar to his own. But he looked at him now, and they nodded at each other. “We don’t wait.”

The six original Avengers stood in a circle around the Stones. They were not alone. The fight had taken them off world, where a group of aliens had joined them. Nebula and Rocket were there, and they’d brought all manner of strange friends with them. Wong and Rhodes, Okoye, and M’Baku were also there. When Tony looked around he saw a host of people with skin in the game. Every single one of them had lost to Thanos.

“We are the gauntlet,” said Tony, looking at Clint, then at Thor and Natasha and Bruce, and finally, Steve. “What is it you keep harping on about? We do this together. _We_ are the gauntlet. There are six stones, and six of us. We each take a Stone.”

No one said anything until a voice spoke from behind. “It will kill you,” said Nebula. She had been standing beside Thanos’s enormous body. She tore her gaze away, and her black eyes swallowed each of them. 

“Yeah,” said Rocket. “Without a device to channel the Stones? No group, no matter how strong you are, can survive all six. We barely managed that purple Stone. That was just one Stone, and we had Quill who’s half Celestial.”

“So, we die,” said Steve. “If we can fix what Thanos did before that happens, it’ll be worth it.”

“It won’t be as easy as that,” said Nebula, and her tone of voice made Tony shiver—quiet and deadly and certain. “Your lives may not be sufficient. If you do this, it will cost more than your lives. Look what it did to Thanos.”

They turned away from her. “We can’t debate this forever,” said Tony. “We do this, or we walk away.”

No one walked away. Without another word, Thor stooped to pluck the Power Stone from the broken gauntlet. His cries filled the air as the power threatened to shatter him from the inside. Natasha took hold of his other hand, the power transferring to her. She managed to pick up the Reality Stone. A storm of dust and wind blew around them in a whirlwind. Clint took hold of Natasha, and then picked up the Mind Stone. His eyes were fire, his skin melting. Tony turned to search for Bruce in the storm, but the Hulk stood there instead, his enormous hand grasping Clint’s, holding him and the others. The storm swirled around in a growing vortex. The Hulk bellowed as he clasped the Time stone in his hand. Braced against the wind, Steve wrapped one hand around the Hulk’s forearm, then he picked up the Space Stone. 

Tony could barely see, his armor covering his face, protecting him as much as it could. He took hold of Steve’s arm and bent to pick up the final stone, the Soul Stone, held in his left hand. It was like being torn apart, like every molecule in his body went nuclear—with power, heat and destruction.

When he grabbed Thor, the Avengers linked into a circle. Then, there was no sound, no air, no movement, no light, no dark. 

~~

Tony opened his eyes. He was in a dark place, disoriented. At first he thought he must be lying down, but then his equilibrium seemed to spin and spin. He was falling, tumbling head over heels as he picked up speed, the wind whistling in his ears. He remembered this—falling from the wormhole; any moment now the Hulk would catch him. 

But the Hulk didn’t catch him. Not this time—and when he hit the ground, he shattered into a million pieces, broken amidst the rocks. 

He heard his name, over and over again. “Tony? Oh my God, Tony, are you okay?” 

“Pepper?” he asked, trying to raise his head to see. The armor faceplate lifted. “Is that you?”

“Mr. Stark! Don’t move. Let me help you.”

“Peter?” asked Tony, confused. Everything was a blur of moving shadows and light, his eyes slow to focus. “How’d you get here?”

Slowly, the formless blob in front of him split into two, and he began to distinguish features. Long strawberry red hair, periwinkle blue eyes shining bright with unshed tears. “Tony. Are you okay?” asked Pepper. It was really her.

He could hardly believe it, too stunned to do more than gape at her. But movement on his other side grabbed his attention. Peter Parker peering at him, brow creased with concern. 

“Maybe we should take it easy, huh, Mr. Stark?” said Peter. “That was a pretty nasty fall.”

“I don’t understand,” said Tony, looking with wonder from one to the other. He felt the first trickle of relief. They’d done it—they had really done it. Somehow, against all odds, he had both Pepper and the kid back. 

He tried to focus on his surroundings: gray rocks; he lay just inside the lip of a cave and outside he saw a white, colorless sky. Where was he? But he knew where he was. He’d always known. In some ways, he’d never left. Any moment and the terrorists would return. He had seconds to get out of there. Fear gripped him. “We have to leave,” he said, trying to rise to his feet. “We’re not safe here. We have to go, right now.”

“Tony,” said Pepper. She sounded distant, although she wasn’t more than half a foot from him. “It’s going to be okay.”

“What?” he asked, unfixed panic flooding his body. He tried to grab hold of her, but he couldn’t unclench his left fist. She stood out of reach, even though she was right in front of him. “Honey, we have to get out of here.”

“Mr. Stark,” said Peter, and Tony turned to look at him. Peter shook his head. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“No, no,” cried Tony, desperate. They had to get out of this place immediately, before Raza returned. In his periphery, he saw a shadowy figure climbing over the rocky hills. “Honey, I’m not kidding around here. We have to go. Now.”

Pepper and Peter took a step back. Tony searched for the figure coming closer, but each time he tried to get a good look, the figure moved outside his field of vision. But he was getting closer and closer—wrapped in flowing dark fabric, like the specter of death. He tried to shield Pepper and Peter, but the specter kept changing position.

“What do you want?” he demanded. 

At first he was answered with silence. Then, a voice spoke. “You know what I want.”

He recognized Raza’s voice, suddenly so tired he had to sit down against the rocky wall. Would he ever escape Afghanistan? The figure stepped in and out of shadow. “I can’t do that for you.”

“It is a simple choice, Tony.” This time the specter sounded like Obadiah. But it couldn’t be him. Explosions caused the cave to shake, raining debris. 

Tony shook his head, still unable to unclench his left fist. “No.”

Both Pepper and Peter stood beside him, lifelike and breathing—so close, yet so far away. Their expressions pained him, full of concern—Pepper’s worried eyes, Peter’s confusion, his sadness as he looked at Tony. Jesus Christ, Peter was just a kid. 

More explosions followed, even closer. 

“You’re a better man than this,” said the specter, its voice changing again. 

Tony started to laugh. “Dad?” He tried to look at his father but the figure slipped away each time he tried. 

“You have a choice, son. That’s more than others get.”

Tony couldn’t see the specter’s face, always hidden in the shadow of the cave. Was it the terrorist, Raza? Was it Obadiah? Was it his father?

“If I refuse?” asked Tony, lifting his head to look at Pepper. He never wanted to look at anything else. He wanted to go back in time to their jog through Central Park. They had the Time Stone, didn’t they? Why couldn’t he just go back and freeze time in that one moment, and never leave again? 

“You’ll lose her one way or the other.”

“Goddamn you,” said Tony, shaking his head. His stomach seized, and he went down on all fours, left fist clenched. The cave began to shake, rocks falling. “Don’t make me do this. Please.”

“No one is making you do anything. You sought the Stones. If you wish to wield their power, then you must choose.” The voice didn’t sound like Raza or Obadiah or his father anymore. 

There was a high-pitched whine and then he heard a series of mid-air explosions. Tony recognized the deployment of a Jericho missile. They had mere seconds before more explosions followed, blanketing the area and reducing everything to rubble. 

“All right,” he said in the final seconds. Everything shook like they were in a centrifuge. In the rising dust, he looked at Pepper. He tried to tell her everything in his heart. She was his choice, always would be. Could she understand what he needed to do? In this half-life of a cave, could she hear what he wanted to say? He looked at her for as long as he could before he turned to Peter, and he opened his fist. Then he was yelling, and yelling, as everything shook and the world caved in.

~~

When he returned to awareness, he was still on his hands and knees being sick onto the ground. His left hand burned, but he refused to look at it. It took him several moments to realize someone was kneeling beside him, gently taking hold of his shoulders while he threw up. Wiping his mouth, he turned and saw Peter Parker looking terrified and worried. 

“You,” he croaked to Peter, marveling that Peter was a solid, physical presence right next to him, alive and breathing. He could touch him. Then, bit by bit, he became aware of his surroundings. He half expected to still be in the cave in Afghanistan, but in fact he was millions of miles and several years away from that place. He was on an alien planet, with the other Avengers, and they were trying to save the universe.

“Hey, Mr. Stark,” answered Peter in a quiet voice, helping him to stand. 

Blinking, Tony looked around at the others. First, he spotted Natasha, bending over and cradling her hand, with Nick Fury standing beside her. Then, he saw Bruce sitting by himself cross-legged, staring at both hands. Thor was nearby, also on the ground being helped up by a female warrior wearing light gray armor and a jewel-blue cape flowing in the breeze. 

He looked for Steve, but found Sam Wilson and James Buchannan Barnes instead. Barnes was deathly pale, his expression drawn tight with a slow, dawning horror. Wilson’s face crumpled in pain. He shook his head over and over again. Barnes was staring at something shiny and blue, resting in the center of his hand.

Tony looked down at his own hand, and saw the Soul Stone. He could pluck it if he wanted to, chuck it away, but he didn’t. 

A baby cried out. Laura Barton was struggling to hold her youngest, a wiggling child of about two or three years old. The other two kids—and, jeez, they’d gotten tall since he’d last seen them, the boy near Peter’s age—stood quietly by her side. The small child didn’t understand, but Tony could see by their expressions that the older children did. Laura held the toddler too tightly, burying her face against his small body. Clint was nowhere to be seen. 

Realization doused over Tony, icy cold and icy hot at the same time. He felt like he was going to be sick again. He turned to look at Peter whose eyes had filled with tears as he watched Tony closely. 

Someone spoke his name, and he turned with relief to see Rhodey, and beside him Wong and Nebula, and all the others that had gathered on this planet to fight Thanos. “What happened?” asked Rhodes.

Tony shook his head. “What did you see?”

“We couldn’t see anything. As soon as Thor picked up the first stone, there was too much wind and debris.”

Tony walked away from Rhodes, pulling free of Peter’s too gentle hands. He stumbled toward Natasha and Thor. Bruce was still in shock on the ground. 

“Tony, man, what the hell happened?” asked Rhodes again. 

His chest hurt where the arc reactor used to be. “We had to make a choice,” he said, barely managing to get breath in his lungs. “To use the Stones, we each had to make a choice. A sacrifice.”

Tony realized, Peter knew. He knew why he was standing there, alive. And when Tony caught Nick Fury’s gaze, he realized Nick knew too. Wilson and Barnes knew. The female Asgardian warrior knew. Laura Barton knew as she cradled her crying child with a blank expression. 

He turned back to Peter. He couldn’t quite look at Rhodey while he said the words, his voice breaking. “A choice between… My choice. Between Pepper and the kid.”

Although Rhodes didn’t make a sound, Tony shied away from his shocked understanding and dismay. He only had eyes for Peter. The tears were spilling freely down Peter’s face, and he was breathing harshly as he tried to get control. This was a terrible burden to bear, Tony realized. It might crush him. It would link him and Peter forever. 

The world began to darken around the edges, and he heard cries of alarm from Rhodes and Peter. They rushed to catch him before he hit the ground. 

~~

Those that were from Earth returned to Earth, and life was somehow supposed to go on. 

There were celebrations and ceremonies, but none of the Avengers attended. Awards were given in their absence. A 24-hour news cycle relentlessly chewed its way over every moment of the Battle of Wakanda, the arrival of Thanos’s army, his ships and his obsession. They listed the Stones, their purpose, their powers. They hailed the Avengers as heroes and gave posthumous honors to Steve Rogers and Clint Barton. Everyone rejoiced to have the other half of humanity returned to them. And always, at the end of the news segment or interview or speech, someone would thank them. “We hope they know how grateful we are. Avengers, if you’re watching this, if you’re listening, thank you.”

Tony never watched or listened, and the last thing he wanted was anyone’s gratitude. Days went by, and then months until it was half a year later. He stayed in his lab in Malibu. He refused to see everyone, except for Rhodey but mostly because Friday would let him in anyway and he’d never changed Rhodey’s access. 

“Are you eating, sleeping? I know you’re not bathing,” said Rhodey, wrinkling his nose. 

Tony merely gave him side-eye as he grabbed a socket wrench and loosened the bolts holding the engine mounts for the Shelby Cobra. So far he’d taken apart and put back together two of his cars, and now he was on his third. He knew Rhodes thought he was going crazy. It was weird and obsessive to take apart and put back together the same cars over and over again, even for him. But he did it on purpose. It gave him something to do with his hands while his brain continued to work on—he stopped that train of thinking. He didn’t even want to think about it while Rhodes was there. 

“If you’re here just to nag, you can turn right around again,” said Tony. “Yes, I’m eating, I’m sleeping. I get up in the morning. I don’t know what else you want.”

Rhodes sighed, his worried expression etched so deep into his face Tony knew the lines would be permanent. He turned his attention back to the Shelby’s engine block, taking the straps for the lift and anchoring them properly. 

“Tony,” said Rhodey, far too gently. “The acting CEO of Stark Industries keeps calling me. They can’t get through to you. The board meeting is in a few weeks. They’re going to start selling off parts of the company, Tony. He thought you might have something to say about that.”

Tony sighed, staring at the clean bright car engine. “Thanks for letting me know.”

“Really? That’s it? Everything your father did to build that company. Everything you did. Everything she--”

Tony whirled around and faced Rhodes. “Don’t.”

Rhodes visibly swallowed. He took a moment, and Tony thought maybe he’d leave finally, but then Rhodey shook his head. “No Tony. Pepper put all her time and energy into Stark Industries. And she did it because she loved you. And you’re going to let that all disappear? Just like that?”

“Goddamn it,” said Tony, his chest aching like someone had punched him. “Yes. I am. Now get the hell out.”

Taking a deep breath, Rhodes straightened up, and they looked at each other. “I brought a visitor to see you. He’s upstairs.”

“What?” cried Tony, panic making his ears ring. “Why’d you do that? I don’t want to see anyone.”

“Yeah well, it’s Nick Fury. He can be very insistent. You try saying no to him. Just talk to him. Please?” Tony wrapped his arms around his middle and refused to look at Rhodes, leaning against the body of the Shelby Cobra. When he didn’t answer, Rhodes sighed again. “I’m gonna take that as a yes. Friday, please show Director Fury down to the lab?”

“Yes, sir,” answered Friday. Tony glared at the ceiling. 

Despite his protests, when Tony saw Nick enter the lab—giving a passing nod to Rhodes who retreated back upstairs to give them privacy—he wanted to throw himself into Fury’s arms. It was embarrassing. They didn’t have anywhere near that kind of relationship. But Nick represented a part of Tony’s life that seemed forever gone now. Weird to think of the time after the Attack on New York as a highlight, but there you have it. He wrapped his arms tighter around his middle.

Nick went over to one of the chairs in the lab and sat down, indicating Tony should join him. He thought about being stubborn and turning his back on Nick, but he found he didn’t actually want to do that. He rolled another chair over so he could sit across from him. 

At first, Nick only looked at him with his one good eye. In Nick’s face, Tony saw understanding and forgiveness. He began to tremble. Nick was one of the chosen, like Peter. He was connected to Tony in that same way.

Tony’s throat hurt. “Nick, I can’t do this today,” he managed, tears stinging his eyes.

“I know,” said Nick, with compassion. “I know. I’m not here to talk about what happened.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” said Tony with a trace of his old sarcasm. “Then why are you here?”

“Natasha Romanoff. She’s gone. Disappeared a couple of months ago, and no one can find her.”

“That surprises you?” asked Tony, although he felt a twang of regret. Disappearing seemed like a good idea, though. Why hadn’t he thought of that? 

“Not really, no. If this were any other time, I wouldn’t even think twice about it. She’s disappeared before. But now, with what happened…” he trailed off. “Well. We need to find her.”

Nick didn’t have to go into any detail. To say that, after the Snap, those of the original Avengers that remained were fucked up by the experience was an understatement of massive proportions. He guessed a missing unhinged deadly ex-Russian assassin must make everyone a little more nervous. 

“Why are you telling me this?” asked Tony. 

Nick shrugged. “I guess I hoped you might have some insight.”

Dum-E and U beeped and booped, whirring mechanically from the back corner of the lab that Tony wanted to keep hidden. Their not-quite-subtle attempt at guarding what was over there caught Nick’s attention, and Tony saw him begin to turn to look. 

“Romanoff’s never been what you call ‘open.’ Especially not with me,” said Tony, bringing Fury’s attention back on to him. “You should be speaking with Sam Wilson. He’s the one that was in hiding with her for over two years. If anyone knows where to find her, he does.”

Fury pursed his lips as he studied Tony, then grimaced and shook his head. “Wilson is…unable to help right now.” 

He didn’t need to explain further, although it did make Tony wonder how bad off Sam must be for Fury to come to him in search of Natasha. Although maybe that was just a thin excuse. 

“Before she disappeared, Natasha said something to me I’ve been trying to understand. She said ‘It all looks real. And sometimes it is. And sometimes its not. And we live in the middle.’ Do you know what she meant?”

Tony started laughing a rusty, creaky kind of laugh. 

~~

When they first returned to Earth, broken and in shock, they’d gathered together for one last time before disbanding. In the conference room at Avengers Headquarters, the four remaining original Avengers, plus Sam Wilson and James Barnes, Nick Fury, Peter Parker, the woman called Valkyrie, and Laura Barton, each sat or stood and waited. They didn’t let anyone else in, not even Rhodes, and disabled all cameras and recording devices. Their experiences with the Stones would eventually be known to everyone, but for the time being, they didn’t want anyone listening. They darkened the windows. Tony even blocked Friday. 

Natasha was the first to speak. 

“It was all black at first. Just darkness and storm and I couldn’t see anything. All I could think was I needed to hold on to the Stone, no matter what. So that’s what I tried to do. And everything just got louder and louder until I was suddenly on the floor of the testing hall in the Red Room. It always seems to go back to that place. 

“At first I thought I was alone. Then I saw Nick. And Maria. They were tied to chairs, bound and gagged. This was normal for the testing room, to have victims brought in, helpless and restrained. I tried to run to them, but couldn’t get closer than a few feet away. It was close enough, though. Close enough that I could see what they were thinking. 

“In the Red Room, testing day meant choices. Every testing day meant a choice of some kind. Making us choose made us complicit. It stained my hands and much as theirs. Red in my ledger.

“Someone was behind me, but I couldn’t see who it was, couldn’t see their face. I thought it was the matron but then, she touched my hair, brushed it out of my face. The matron never showed kindness like that. Whoever it was, they had a soft touch, like a mother’s touch. Each time I turned to see who it was, they slide behind me.

“‘Don’t make me do this,’ I said. 

“‘But this is nothing new for you,’ they answered. The voice was familiar. I still don’t know who it was. ‘You have made this choice before, Natalia. This is the price you must pay. Assess the situation, review your choices, then make your decision. There is no getting out of this.’

“They placed a gun in my hand.

“Each time I had to do this before on testing day, the victims had struggled against the restraints, trying to break free, begged behind their gag, but neither Nick nor Maria moved. They followed me with their eyes. They understood. They had read the situation. Of course they had. They knew. When I finally raised my gun, Maria knew…she… I didn’t…”

Natasha stopped speaking, her voice going raspy and faint. She sat in the conference room with the others, dry-eyed and pale, then fell silent and wouldn’t speak any more. She wouldn’t look at Nick. 

~~

When Nick and Rhodes finally left, Tony waited for several minutes until he got the all clear from Friday. “They’ve gone, boss.”

He took a deep breath, letting the silence of the house settle. In the distance he could hear the sound of the ocean waves crashing along the rocky cliff side. It used to be a soothing sound. Dum-E tick-tocked and then U beep-booped, both robots shifting to return to their previous tasks from before the interruption of Rhodey’s visit. Tony turned in time to see one of the shadows from that corner of the lab detach from the others. Natasha Romanoff stepped into the light. 

“Thanks for not giving me away,” she said.

He shrugged. “What are old teammates for, huh?”

She gave him a soft half smile, then glanced behind her where something gleamed in the shadows. They both approached his worktable. The experimental gauntlet was a dull, brushed pewter color, made mostly from vibranium T’Challa had given him. It was positioned upright on a small dais that spun. He’d chosen to change the locations for the Stones—one per each knuckle, one on the back of the hand, and one on the palm, where a repulsor beam would go. 

“So, this is it?” she asked.

Tony shook his head. “Maybe.”

They stood side-by-side, neither moving until Tony felt Natasha reach her decision, and she held out her left hand, palm side up. In the center, was the Realty Stone casting beams of red light over the room. It no longer held any power against Natasha, and she plucked it from her palm and dropped it in its place on the gauntlet. A shock wave knocked every frame off the walls. 

Natasha’s hair was longer than he remembered from the last time they’d seen each other, her roots a mixture of auburn and a light brown that faded into her blonde hair. He realized he was probably seeing her real hair color for the first time. In the light, he saw strawberry highlights in her hair, and it made his chest ache. She wore no make up, her skin a little sallow from lack of sun. 

Carefully, she leaned in and kissed his cheek. It had been months since he’d physically been close to another human being, and he guessed it was the same for her. He bowed his head. She brought her left hand—free of the Stone—to cup his face. It was her way of saying good-bye. When he lifted his head, she was gone and he was left alone in his lab.

~~

He lay flat on the floor, staring at the ceiling. It was pretty comfy, for a hard cement floor. Tony had been lying there for at least an hour, maybe longer. For no reason other than it seemed the thing to do in that moment. The robots were confused. Dum-E arm kept occasionally peering down at him. 

Tony wondered what time it was. It must be early in the evening. He remembered that it had been light outside not that long ago. “Hey, Friday,” he said. “Put a call through to the kid for me.”

“Yes, boss.”

A moment later, Peter’s voice answered. “Mr. Stark,” he said. “I’m so glad you called.”

“Hey, kid,” said Tony. The part of him that was still on Titan, the part that had never left, unclenched when he heard Peter’s voice. “What’re you up to? Is it late? Did I wake you?”

“Uh, physics homework, actually,” answered Peter. “It’s not too late. A little past ten.”

“Physics? Well, I’m pretty good at that stuff. Hit me with a problem. Let’s work through it together.”

“Oh,” said Peter. “Okay. Sure.” He rattled off a homework question about a car driving in a ten-meter circle around a pole at a certain speed, and inside the car hung a disco ball that had an ant on it. Peter had to figure out the position of the ant in relation to the base of the pole as a function of time. 

“Is the ant named Scott?” asked Tony.

“Uh…what?” asked Peter, clearly confused. 

“Never mind,” said Tony, laughing to himself. “All right, champ. Walk me through it. I’ve already got the answer. Do you?”

They worked on a couple of problems, then Tony asked after Aunt May. 

“She’s okay,” said Peter. “Uh, Mr. Stark?”

“Yeah?” answered Tony, but he knew that tone of voice from Peter, anticipating what would come next. It always happened at one point every time he called. 

“Do you think I could come see you? I’ve got money saved. I could fly myself out there.”

Tony didn’t say anything at first. Then, he spoke in a rush. “This has been fun, hasn’t it?”

“No, Mr. Stark. Before you go--”

“Next time, maybe we can work on your Spanish. Bueno.”

“Please--”

“Good talking to you, kid,” said Tony, making a hand gesture. Friday ended the call. 

~~

Several days passed without any distinction to separate one from the other besides the sun rising and setting. The Shelby Cobra was spread across the entire floor of the lab in pieces. When it appeared to be daylight again, Friday coaxed Tony upstairs to shower and eat a meal. He refused at first, but then Friday shut down all the lights in the lab, darkened the windows, and left him in murky darkness unable to work. His robots herded him toward the stairs. 

He hadn’t seen the upstairs of his home in days, and almost didn’t recognize it. Without his being aware, his housekeeper had come and gone. The house sparkled, echoing with loneliness. It was moments like this that Tony was glad the first Malibu house had been destroyed. This rebuilt house didn’t carry the same memories. It wasn’t the home Pepper had first come to live in with him. Damp from his shower, he poked around in the kitchen for food when lightning arced across the sky blindingly bright. A moment later, Thor landed on his balcony. 

Visitors, thought Tony with disgust. But he’d been expecting Thor. Thor didn’t seem to be in a hurry to come in from the balcony, remaining outside gazing at the ocean. Aside from his giant battle-axe, he was dressed like a civilian in jeans and a hoodie. 

Tony went outside to join him. It was the first time he’d gone outside in weeks and the sun made him squint until the nanotech gave him a pair of sunglasses. There was a breeze and fresh air and the spray of the ocean—all things he’d missed. 

“This is a beautiful place,” said Thor, without turning around. “A fitting spot for a home.”

The sky was a dramatic patchwork of clouds with shafts of sunlight breaking through, the sea a choppy mosaic beneath it. “I used to think so,” he said, and they both watched the sea churn before Tony got tired of squinting in the sunlight. “You’re just in time for lunch. If you care to join me.”

Thor’s hair was as short as before but less haphazard looking. Tony shifted uncomfortably as Thor took a moment to study him, knowing he must look a mess. But Thor’s expression was gentle, and he nodded with a tight smile, letting Tony lead him inside. 

With Thor’s input, Tony was able to put two sandwiches together. They carried their meal to the lower deck where there was shade but Thor could still gaze out to the ocean and watch the waves. 

“So tell me,” said Tony. “How goes Asgard?”

“Valkyrie sends word. They’re making good time, but are still several months away.”

After everything had happened, Thor had told them that a refugee ship with what remained of the Asgardian people was headed for Earth, intent on making their home there. It had sent all the governments of the world into a tizzy. 

“There aren’t that many of us,” Thor had explained, in his usual calm way but with enough bite in it that it had shut everyone up when he spoke. He told them how Thanos had killed half his people, already diminished after the destruction of their planet. “We won’t take up much space.”

Still, a roaring debate erupted among the nations of the world until Wakanda came forward and agreed to host and accept the Asgardian refugees to their country, and Thor graciously accepted. It was the only bit of real world news that Tony had bothered to follow. He thought the United States government were a bunch of idiots, and should have jumped at the chance. T’Challa was no fool. With a combined Wakanda and Asgard, and a marriage of their advanced technologies, Tony gave them five to twenty years before they completely reshaped the world. He almost wished he would be around to see it. 

Their loss, he thought, gazing at the magnificence of Thor as Thor gazed out to the sea. Even shrouded in a ratty hoodie, he looked kingly. 

Thor had sent the Valkyrie back to his people, but to the surprise of everyone except the original Avengers, he’d chosen to remain on Earth to wait for Asgard to arrive. Tony knew why, even if no one else did. Thor felt responsible. For all of them, but especially for Bruce.

“How is he?” asked Tony, having avoided the question until then. Every week Friday gave him a status update on the other Avengers, plus Barnes and the Barton family. After they all returned to Earth, Bruce had gone with Dr. Strange, first to New York, and then to God only knew where in Nepal, some cloistered retreat. Thor was the only one that visited Bruce regularly. 

Thor crumpled his napkin into a ball and seemed like was going to throw it but instead he dropped it onto his plate. “He has good days and bad days,” he said. “Like all of us. He asks after you often. You’re allowed to visit him, you know. I think he would like that.”

Just the thought of leaving Malibu set Tony’s heart pounding and his hands start to sweat. “Uh… yeah. I’ve been meaning to.”

Thor gave him another tight smile, and then patted him on the arm. Of all the Avengers, those that had formed the gauntlet, those that had to make a choice, he and Thor were the most alike in their loss. 

“Well,” said Tony at last, when they had sat in mutual silence for untold minutes, the sun having started its slide toward evening. “Shall we?”

Without answering, Thor nodded, and they rose together, entering the house and heading for the basement. Friday had deigned to bring the lights back on, although that part of the lab with the experimental gauntlet remained hidden and in shadows. Yet, it still drew them toward it, like a magnet. They stopped in front of the worktable and stared down at the gauntlet. Then, Thor opened his left palm and the room was flooded with a purple light.

~~

After Natasha finished speaking they all remained silent. A few cleared their throats. Chairs creaked as people shifted in their seat. They waited for someone to speak next. 

Thor was standing with his back to the others, staring at the grayed out windows of the conference room that kept them shielded. 

He turned and placed his hands on the table, leaning all his weight onto it as he started to speak. 

“When my father was alive, he spoke often of what it meant to be king. To rule. To sit on the throne and lead our people, not only in battle and in war, but in the every day, in the mundane and the sublime. In my youth, I wanted nothing else but to be king. I thought it my right. Then, in my brashness, I was exiled, cast down to Earth. Here, I made friends. I changed. And the throne didn’t seem so inviting anymore. I thought, in refusing it, I was being noble. I thought I could do more good away from the shackles of kingship. I don’t know. Maybe I did some good, maybe not. Maybe it was a selfish decision, following my heart.

“I chose the Power Stone because I feared none of you could hold it for long enough. When I held it, it was like being ripped apart atom by atom. But, then I woke up in a cave. A familiar cave. I’d been there once before to seek the Waters of Sight. Like before, I was not alone, but my companion was hidden from me. At first, I thought it was my father, guiding me to the Waters. And then I thought it was Heimdall. Each time I tried to see who it was, they shifted and changed. But it didn’t matter, I knew who stood beside me. I would know him anywhere.

“The Waters of Sights are home to spirits. If they accept you, they may give you insight. But I did not know why I was there. So I asked, ‘What am I supposed to find here? What should I seek?’

“And, although I could not see my companion, he answered and said, ‘You never ask the right questions, brother. Only you can answer that.’ 

“I entered the water, and let it engulf me. And the spirits showed me two dreams, and told me I had to choose between them. One was Valkyrie. Valkyrie is my people, my home. And the other was… she was….”

While speaking, Thor gripped the edge of the table so hard that it cracked. The entire room held their collective breath. Behind Thor stood Valkyrie, dark-eyed and somber. She kept her attention solely on Thor. After he got himself under control, he turned to face her. Something grave and solemn passed between them. “I chose as a king would,” he said, his voice low. 

Weeks later, while Tony barricaded himself in his Malibu home, refusing visitors and deeply entrenched in his work, Friday showed him a news article reporting how Thor went to see Dr. Erik Selvig at the university where Selvig taught. The article stated Selvig listened to Thor for a few seconds, but then punched him hard enough to make Thor stagger backward. 

Tony read the article. Lucky bastard, he thought. He wished he could go to someone, a family member or a friend, and have them punch him in the face. But he and Pepper were their only family, and all their friends were as broken as he was. 

~~

Thor insisted Tony go see Bruce. He wouldn’t take no for an answer. It put Tony into a cold sweat. “Thor, I can’t. I have too much to do. I can’t leave.”

“You’re lying,” said Thor. They went upstairs so Tony could show Thor to the balcony and he would take his axe and leave and Tony would be alone again. It was evening by then, the sun starting to dip. But Thor was refusing to go. “I know you’re lying. What is more important than this? You need Bruce. You know you do. You have to go to him. I’ll remain here, and protect your home, and the Stones.”

“I don’t… I can’t,” protested Tony, trying to back away. But he did need Bruce. If this was going to work, he needed all of them. 

“Tony,” said Thor, changing his tone. Oh no, thought Tony. The last thing he needed was that soft Asgardian look Thor was giving him, approaching Tony like he was a wounded animal. “This is what we do. We get back on our feet, even when…” Thor sighed. “Even when we can’t, we do it anyway.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Been channeling Rogers, have you?” But invoking Steve Rogers was probably the worst thing Tony could have done. Thor’s nostrils flared and he folded his arms, and they both tried to out-stubborn the other. Behind Thor a portal opened up, the kind produced by Dr. Strange and his fellow wizards. “What in the...” said Tony. “How did they know to do that now?”

Thor shrugged. “They’re wizards. How do they know to do anything? Are you going?”

Tony stubbornly held his arms crossed, shaking his head in annoyance while Thor waited for him to make his decision. “Ah, fuck it,” said Tony, giving up. Thor gave him a lopsided grin. “Just to be clear,” said Tony, pointing his finger at Thor. “I don’t like being ambushed.”

“Yes, I noticed,” said Thor, clapping Tony on the back before gently pushing him through the portal. 

On the other side, Tony found himself in a temple room, dark and murky. The air smelled of spices and he heard a quiet chanting in the distance. Wong was there to greet them. “Welcome to Kamar-Taj. It’s good to see you,” said Wong, with a bow. 

“Uh yes,” said Tony, looking around, curious. A wizened-looking man in elaborate robes sat in a corner reading a book. “Good to be here, I guess.”

“Sit,” instructed Wong, indicating low cushions where someone had set up a tea service. “I’ll go see if Dr. Banner is awake yet.”

Wong left before Tony could protest, leaving him in the company of the silent monk who barely looked in his direction. He realized with the time change it was probably very early in the morning. 

Tony eyed the tea service. The last thing Tony wanted to do was to sit and drink tea. This place was different than the sanctum in New York City, but they both held the same quiet serenity, an oasis in a busy bumbling world. The old man in the corner didn’t try to stop him as he wondered off, down open-air hallways that led to other temple rooms, each filled with the chilled air that carried the bite of mountain snow. He found himself in an interior room, walled on all four sides. He was about to wander on to another part of the temple when he noticed that each wall of the room held a landscape painting—but the pictures moved and changed. 

That’s a neat trick, he thought. One landscape showed him a rainforest with majestic, wild looking trees and crazy-feathered birds flying back and forth. Another revealed an underwater world with immense tropical-like fishes darting every which way. He stepped closer to the next hanging picture and watched a scene of a busy city with a lot of foot traffic, people walking every which way. Some of the people looked human, but most had multicolored skin or bore other signs that he was spying on an alien planet, far from Earth. 

He studied the people. The scene suddenly changed, and then he was seeing the inside of a ship traveling in space. The ship looked to be engaged in some kind of space battle. It took him a moment, but then he recognized Nebula. She was yelling, arguing with Rocket and Quill as they piloted around other ships, shooting down their opponents. The other two Guardians were there too, the big guy and the one they called Mantis. He watched Nebula scramble away from her seat, furious with everyone. She headed for another part of the ship, intent on some critical action or maneuver. 

The picture zoomed in closer. From their short time together, Tony knew that anger was Nebula’s defining character trait. Her rage and annoyance sparked off her patchwork skin. As if she was aware of being observed, Nebula stopped, a slight crease developing between her brows. She turned, and then seemed to look directly at Tony. They stared at each other across galaxies. 

His heart pounded in his chest. Nebula stepped even closer and they were practically face-to-face. He remembered that day, six months ago, stranded on a broken planet, and his only companion was this blue-skinned murderous woman. He had thought they were the last two people in the entire universe.

_Can anything be done?_

_I don’t know. Not without the Stones._

I’m trying, he thought. He raised a hand to touch the picture, never taking his eyes off Nebula’s.

“Friday, you with me?” asked Tony, not daring to look away. 

“Yes, boss.”

“What am I looking at?”

Friday took time responding, apparently unsure. “I believe they are some kind of trans-galactic…observation windows.”

“Two-way or one-way,” he wondered. The painting—it was ridiculous to call it a painting but whatever. View screen?—didn’t have an audio component. He couldn’t hear the battle raging behind Nebula, couldn’t hear what she was saying. 

“One-way,” said a voice behind him. Tony turned and saw Stephen Strange standing in the entrance to the room. “The astral windows show only what you ask for.”

Huh, thought Tony, glancing back at the painting, but the connection—if there even had been one—was gone, and Nebula had turned away, returning to her seat at the head of the ship. In the next instant, Strange waved his hand and the images on the paintings went blank. 

Strange stepped into the room and Tony avoided making eye contact. He wouldn’t say he was nervous, exactly, to be in the same room with Dr. Strange, but he didn’t find it comfortable either. 

“How have you been, Tony?” asked Strange, raking his keen attention over Tony’s face. It was times like these that Tony remembered Strange used to be a medical doctor, and felt him catalog his appearance, listing symptoms, plugging away at every diagnosis. 

“Oh you know,” said Tony, trying to make light of his discomfort. “Hanging on to sanity with both hands.”

One corner of Strange’s mouth lifted in a partial smile. “Yes, I know that. All too well. Come. I’ll take you to Bruce.”

Strange led him from the room, and guided him through the maze of corridors, down a couple of short stairways. He wanted to ask about the different futures Strange had seen when he’d communed with the Time Stone. He wanted to beg for guidance. Was he doing the right thing? Was there something he missed? Should he be doing something else? He wanted to know, and he didn’t want to know. Instead, he walked silently beside Strange. 

They arrived at a room somewhere in what seemed to Tony to be a cramped corner of the temple. “He’s in here,” said Strange, pausing outside the door. 

“Thanks,” said Tony. “And thanks for, you know, taking him in. I guess, this is the sort of place he needed, after…”

Strange paused, but then nodded graciously. “We could do no less. The guardianship of the Time Stone has always lain within these walls. The Stone is part of Bruce now.” There was an awkward silence as Strange continued to study Tony, and neither mentioned what Tony was planning to do, or spoke about the experimental gauntlet back in Malibu, or any of it. “It’s good to see you, Tony,” said Strange, with a squeeze of Tony’s shoulder.

“Right,” said Tony, as Strange turned to leave. “You too.”

He waited until Strange turned the corner before knocking on the door. He heard Bruce say, “Come in.”

Part of him expected to see Bruce decked out in full Kamar-Taj robes, sitting in lotus position while levitating in mid-air, shaved bald with a mystical symbol stamped on his forehead. But, Bruce looked very much like Bruce with his shaggy too-long hair going gray, wearing a simple tunic and loose pants, sitting on a cushion by a bay window. 

“Tony,” said Bruce, his voice full of wonder. “Oh my God, Tony. Here, come here, sit. It’s so good to see you,” Bruce pointed to the other side of the window seat. 

“Hey, buddy,” said Tony, taking Bruce’s hands. “You look good.”

Bruce shrugged. He had dark shadows under his eyes, and seemed stretched thin. But he also seemed about a million times better than the last time Tony had seen him. 

“How’s everyone doing? Tell me everything. Thor is the only one that comes here,” Bruce said, but without any malice at all. “How are you? How’s… how’s Natasha?” As soon as he asked the question, Bruce shook his head violently. “Sorry, sorry, that was a dumb question.”

“No, it’s okay,” said Tony. “I just saw Natasha, a couple weeks ago. She’s okay, Bruce. She’s doing good.” It was a bit of a white lie, but for a good cause. Bruce took in a shaky breath. “How about you? Been keeping busy? You learning to do that magic stuff?” Tony waved a hand in a circle, indicating all that mystical crap Strange was always showing off. 

Bruce chuckled, ducking his head shyly. “No. I don’t have the discipline for that. I’m just trying to clear my head, you know. Trying to make sense of things. They have a small clinic nearby. I sometimes help there. Makes me feel like I’m not a total waste.” He gave another one of his weary smiles. 

He took Tony’s hands, cradling them together. Bruce lowered his head to rest against their joined hands. 

“It’s been difficult, Tony,” he said. “I wake up, and I don’t know how, but somehow during the night, I’ve forgotten, and I wake up, and I can’t feel him anymore, and then I don’t know what to do. Nothing makes sense, and I start to panic. My heart rate rises. That was always a bad sign before. But now, nothing happens, and somehow that’ s _worse_ and then I can’t stop. I’m just locked in this spiral. And I gotta start all over again.”

“I know,” said Tony, a totally useless thing to say. Bruce was shaking. “Hey, okay. Don’t go losing it on my now, buddy. They won’t let me see you again if you do. Breathe for me, please.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” said Bruce, taking in a shuddering breath. He had a vise-like grip on Tony’s hands. It seemed to help. “They say, be careful what you wish for, huh? How many years did I spend researching for this, wanting this? And now?” Bruce shook his head. 

Tony watched Bruce take deep breathes, centering himself again. He ignored the pinching pain from Bruce’s grip. “Hey, pal?” he said, waiting for Bruce to look up. “You have to answer me truthfully, okay? Do you want him back?”

They didn’t look away from each other, and Bruce didn’t answer right away.

~~

After Thor spoke, a longer silence lasted in the conference room. No one knew what to say, how to make it better. Bruce started shaking his head, rocking back and forth, faster and harder. 

“Goddamn it,” he said. “Goddamn it. Did we all have to make a choice? Is that what happened? But each of you, you had to choose between two people? Two people that mean something to you? What did I get? I didn’t get that. 

“I didn’t go anywhere. I didn’t see anything. It was just black nothing, and me and the Hulk. Did you all know I’ve never actually seen the Hulk? I only know what he looks like because he ends up on the news so often. But I don’t look in the mirror and see him. Or do I? He’s inside me, I’m inside him. He… he was inside me.

“You all got to choose between two others. I had to choose between me and myself. How do you do that? I mean, what the fuck. How do you choose between two parts of yourself? And how was I supposed to pick? Which part of me gets to live? 

“I was in the blank space and it’s just me and Hulk, and he’s looking at me. And I start to get angry. Like really fucking angry. Isn’t he the one that gets angry? Why wasn’t he fighting? Where was he when I needed him? Why did I have to choose? But he didn’t get angry, because he knew. It was just the two of us, staring at each other, and he knew. The look in his eyes. The disgust. Puny Banner.”

Bruce stopped speaking, and raised his head to look at everyone in the room. His eyes were glassy and wet. He turned to Natasha. “Nat,” he said, pleading. “I can’t feel him? I don’t know where he is?” He turned to Tony. “Tony, he won’t come out. Where’d he go?”

Tony’s throat went dry, and he didn’t know what to say. 

“How am I supposed to work without him? Thor? No one’s got a hand on the wheel anymore.”

Bruce slapped himself hard across his face. Then, he tried punching himself, over and over again. He really tried to cause injury, yelling, until Nick grabbed him and Thor clamped his strong arms around Bruce from behind. “Banner, stop it. Just stop.”

He howled in rage. 

~~

Bruce tilted his head to one side as he inspected Tony more closely than he had before. 

“I’m serious,” said Tony. “This is serious. Answer truthfully, do you want him back or not?”

“If I said no, what would you do?”

Tony swallowed, and shook his head. It was a good question. If Bruce said no, then everything Tony had worked for in the last six months would be for nothing. But he had at least learned something from this entire mess, and he wouldn’t but his needs higher than Bruce’s, or anyone else’s. This wouldn’t work, if he did. “I don’t know,” he said, truthfully.

Bruce smiled, and shook his head. “Thanks for asking. That means a lot. But it’s not a matter of wanting. It’d be easier if that’s all it was. I never wanted any of this. I don’t always get what I want, and then when I do, it’s not what I want anymore in the first place. I used to want to go back in time and stop myself from doing the experiment.”

“Why can’t you do that? You have the Time Stone.”

Bruce snorted. “You know it doesn’t work like that. And what if I did, Tony? Everything that has happened since then, the good and the bad, it would all change. Changing the past would break apart the fabric of reality—threaten the multiverse. It would fracture everything, even worse than it is now. No.” He shook his head, rubbing his hands over Tony’s to create a little heat. “It’s not a matter of wanting. We need him back. I need him back.”

Tony nodded, and then a moment later, a portal opened up right in the center of the room. Through the circle of the portal he could see his home in Malibu, waiting for him to step through. “Goddamn it. How do they do that?”

Bruce chuckled. “They’re wizards. Why even bother asking?”

“Yeah, yeah,” groused Tony. He patted Bruce’s hands one more time, then got up, surprised when Bruce stood up with him. “You’re coming with me?”

“Yeah. For a bit. If that’s okay?”

Tony nodded and shook his head at the same time. “More than okay.”

They stepped through together, and the portal vanished behind them. While the day was just getting started in Kathmandu, in Malibu the sun was nearly set. Tony wasn’t surprised to find Thor on the balcony, gazing at the horizon. They joined him until the sun disappeared. Then, Thor gave his farewells and shot up unto the fading light leaving him with Bruce. Bruce was wide-awake and Tony didn’t sleep, so he showed Bruce around the lab and they talked quietly deep into the night. It wasn’t until the sky began to lighten again that Bruce turned toward the darkened corner of the lab where neither of them had ventured all night long. 

“Shall we?” asked Bruce.

“Yeah. I guess we better,” said Tony. 

He led Bruce over to his workstation, removing the fabric he’d thrown over the gauntlet to mask the light it cast off. The Stones sprayed a rainbow on the wall. “You sure this is going to work?” asked Bruce.

“Nope,” said Tony, shaking his head. “Not a clue.”

Bruce huffed a laugh. “That means it will.” He took a deep breath and opened his left palm. The Time Stone added a ray of green light upwards to the ceiling. Bruce plucked the Stone from his palm, then dropped it in its place on the gauntlet. 

Behind them, another portal opened. Tony had been expecting it, although he was still disappointed when it appeared. Through the portal, he saw Bruce’s little bedroom from the other side of the world. “You know, you could stay,” he said. “Play around in the lab. Help me out. Have free reign of the house.”

It surprised him that he offered. He didn’t want visitors, not even Bruce. He preferred his solitude, the peace of only having his own thoughts to fight with, and no one else’s. But after hours spent in Bruce’s company, some part of him ached at the thought of being alone again. 

Bruce smiled sadly, then shook his head. “When you need me, I’ll be there. But, for right now…” he trailed off, then shook his head again. “This kind of work, it’s not in me anymore.”

Tony nodded, then looked down at his feet. 

“Hey,” said Bruce, and then he took Tony into his arms. “You’re my hero, Tony. You always were.” 

He squeezed him once more before he let go and stepped through the portal. A second later, the portal vanished. 

~~

The next time Tony called Peter, it was the middle of the day. “Hey, Pete,” he said. He was in his armor, flying in circles over his house. “What are you up to? How was school today?”

“Mr. Stark,” said Peter, sounding like he had been lying down. “I’m…I’m still at home, actually. I didn’t make it into school.”

Tony banked into a spiral, flying in a tighter circle. “You have academic decathlon practice today, don’t you? I thought you liked that.”

“I do,” answered Peter, right away. “I swear I do. It’s just… They talk about what happened every day. My friends, everyone at school. They talk about Spider-Man going into space. They want to know about Titan. And…and Thanos’s ship. What space is like? What meeting an alien is like? And I can’t tell them it was me. They talk about me like I’m not really there, ‘cause I’m not really there. And even if I could tell them, I don’t know what I’d say anyway.”

Tony didn’t have answers for him. “Tell me about the other kids on your decathlon team. What are their names? Are they your friends?”

“Yeah, we’re friends…I guess,” said Peter. He started describing each of his friends to Tony in detail. He spoke mostly about his best friend Ned and a girl named MJ. Tony could tell by the way he described him what kind of friend Flash was. 

“All right, first of all, who calls themselves Flash? Also, he sounds like a dick.”

Peter laughed softly. “Yeah. But he’s, you know, he’s just a kid.”

So are you, thought Tony. It killed him that Peter talked about other kids his age like he wasn’t one of them. Too old already. He’d seen too much. Gone through too much. 

“Trust me, once a dick, always a dick. What about girls? You seeing anyone? Or boys, you know, either is fine.”

Peter huffed. “There is a girl, but…it’s complicated. I haven’t been around a lot, between the whole being beamed onto an alien space ship before being conveniently turned to dust. And then even before all that, last year, this other girl I was seeing ended up being the daughter of that Vulture guy, and I kind of messed things up a lot, having to leave suddenly all the time and never being able to tell her anything. I don’t know. I don’t want to mess it up again.” He paused, then said, “I’m sorry, Mr. Stark. You don’t want to hear about any of this.”

On the contrary, Tony wanted to hear every inane, ridiculous detail from Peter’s life. But he didn’t say so. 

“Pete?” said Tony. “Don’t let anything stop you. I promise you, it’s not as important as you think it is. If you like this girl, you should spend time with her. The rest can wait.”

“Yes, sir,” answered Peter. “Mr. Stark?” 

Tony’s heart began to pound. Inside the armor, he felt clammy and cold. He stopped flying in circles and instead hung in mid air. 

“Please don’t hang up,” said Peter, speaking quickly. “I’m not going to…I just---hope you’re okay. Are you okay?”

Tony didn’t answer for a long time. Inch by inch he slid from the air, sinking until he landed on the deck outside his lab. “Are you going to school tomorrow?”

“Um. Of course,” said Peter, unconvincingly. 

“Don’t lie to me. If you want, I can send a drone to escort you to each of your classes?”

“Really? That would be so cool.”

“Peter.”

Peter was laughing, and it was good to hear. “Okay, sorry. No, no. I swear. I’m not lying. Honest. I’ll go to school tomorrow.”

“All right. Talk to you soon.”

“’Bye, Mr. Stark.”

~~

It took him a couple of days to work up his nerve, but after months of avoidance he finally had Friday contact Happy Hogan. 

After returning from Titan, he didn’t want to see anyone or talk to anyone, especially Happy who reminded him so strongly of Pepper, someone who had been such an integral part of their lives together. He refused all of Happy’s calls, and refused to see him. He used Friday as a go-between and ordered Happy on random, useless tasks that send him all over the country, all over the world. He continued to pay Happy’s salary for three more months before Happy began rejecting the payments. Through Friday, he sent his resignation letter: “I quit. Call me if you ever really need me.”

It stunned Tony. He didn’t know Happy even knew how to refuse a direct deposit into his bank. 

Happy broke all ties. It was a gut punch, but one Tony knew he deserved. 

Friday placed the call, and Tony waited nervously for Happy to pick up. The call clicked over, and there was a pause before he heard Happy’s familiar voice. “Yeah,” he said. 

“Happy,” said Tony. “It’s…it’s me.”

Another long pause. Then, “Yeah.”

All right, he wasn’t going to make this easy. “Hogan, come by the house.” More stubborn silence. “Please.”

Happy sighed, but then he said, “Okay.”

A few hours later, Happy sat opposite Tony in his living room. He was dressed in his usual black suit, white shirt combo. But he looked a great deal thinner. It was good to see him, though. 

“Thanks for coming,” said Tony, trying not to sit on his hands. “I need a few things done, if you’re up for--”

“You wouldn’t take my calls,” interrupted Happy. 

Tony gaped for a second, then nodded. “I know.”

“You wouldn’t let me see you.”

“I know,” he answered, softly. 

“I couldn’t get anywhere near you. How was I supposed to do my job? How was I supposed to… look after you? I don’t know what you’re doing in here? In what kind of state of mind? What was I supposed to do?”

“I know… Happy. I’m sorry.”

“Did you think I’d blame you? Say it’s your fault?”

Tony’s heart climbed into his throat. Who knew Happy would be the only one to give voice to his darkest fear? It felt like the arc reactor was back in his chest, keeping him always moments away from imminent heart failure. “Didn’t you? Isn’t it?”

“Maybe,” agreed Happy, and Tony let out a breath. “But she’d want me to stick by you,” he said, with a tight voice. “And you wouldn’t let me do my job.”

“I know. Are you going to forgive me?” asked Tony, trying to breathe. 

Happy shook his head. “No. Look, I’m not as smart as you, we know that. I don’t pretend to understand anything you do. You felt like you had to make that choice. I don’t know why. I’m assuming you’re working on fixing it? So come on. I’m here for a reason, aren’t I? Tell me?”

Tony had to take a moment to make his throat work again, but he nodded. “Um yeah. There’s a few things I need... for you to do.”

“All right,” said Happy, holding out a hand. “Let’s see the list.”

Despite having worked for Tony Stark for at least a couple of decades, and been an employee of one of the biggest tech conglomerates in the word, Happy was still an analog man. With his hands shaking, Tony hunted around for a notepad and pen, quickly scribbling a list. He tore it from the pad and handed it to Happy. While Happy took his time looking it over, Tony explained what he needed Happy to do.

“Are you sure about number two? I don’t like it. Why do I gotta do that?” said Happy. 

Tony smiled, but he shrugged. “No one else I trust better. Has to be done.”

Happy frowned, but continued to peruse the list. “All right,” he said, folded the piece of paper and putting it in his inside suit pocket. “What about Stark Industries? I read the news, you know. You can’t let it go down.”

“I…” Tony shook his head. 

“You don’t want to replace her. I get it. But you can’t let it die. Tony.”

“No,” said Tony. “You’re right. Of course not. I’ll make some calls. Stop the fire sale. ”

“Okay,” said Happy, rising from his seat. “I’ll check in later.”

Before Happy reached the front door, Tony called out. “That it? That’s all I’m getting?”

“Yup,” said Happy, and he was gone. 

Alone, Tony shook his head. He guessed that could have gone worse. A few minutes later, the phone rang. “Incoming call from Happy Hogan, boss,” said Friday. 

Tony laughed, silently. “Put him through,” he said. 

~~

Happy gave him a twenty-minute warning before he drove up to the Malibu house with the entire Barton family in the back of the limousine. He’d tasked Happy with going to the Barton homestead and convincing Laura to get on a plane with all three kids for an extended family vacation to Southern California. So far they’d spent three days at Disneyland. 

In between amusement parks, they were spending the day with him. The plan was for Happy to bring them to Malibu, before they head south for Legoland and Sea World. Tony was terrified, and had spent the morning in a mild state of indigestion, fighting the urge to lock himself in his lab, and just tell Happy to turn around and forget it. 

The doorbell ding-donged. Tony took a deep breath, and ran up the stairs just as Happy was ushering the two older kids, followed by Laura who carried the toddler in her arms, and then right behind her entered Wanda Maximoff.

Tony knew Wanda had been staying with the Bartons since everything had happened, but hadn’t been expecting she would come with them to visit him. Didn’t think she’d want to. It threw him off his game. But then she looked away, moving to stand with the children. 

“All right,” said Happy. “What I tell you all? No running, no touching. And talk to me if you need to go to the bathroom.”

The kids looked too intimidated to do more than anxiously look around. 

“Hogan, relax,” said Tony, finding a smile for the kids who turned their big eyes on him, apparently startled to see him. “Hello, everyone. You remember me, right? Uncle Tony? Sort of. Um…” Not getting any response from the kids except more timid stares, he turned to Laura. “Thanks for coming.”

“Thank you for having us,” said Laura, shifting Nathaniel in her arms. 

Before another awkward pause could start, Tony turned and whistled. “Guys, come on, our guests are here.”

From the direction of the elevator that went to the lab, Dum-E and U rolled in, whirring cheerfully over to the children. Dum-E carried a box filled with craft and art supplies and set it down at Lila’s feet. U beeped and trilled while Dum-E raised its robotic arm and did a sort of head tilt, clicking a hello. Lila looked delighted and Cooper cracked a smile. 

“That’s how they say ‘hello’ and ‘how do you do?’” said Tony. “Uh, this big fella is called Dum-E and that one is U. I know,” he said when Lila looked amused and unsure if she should laugh. “They’re terrible names. Dum-E and U are going to be your camp counselors for the day. This is Cooper and Lila Barton,” he said to his robots. “Don’t embarrass me. Introduce yourselves.”

Dum-E whistled and chirped, clicking its robotic fingers almost nervously, like it was hoping Lila would take hold of its hand. Both kids looked to their mother for reassurance. 

“Go ahead,” said Laura. “Be polite.”

Hesitantly, Lila took hold of one of Dum-E’s fingers. The robot trilled and beeped. A sweet, enchanted smile crossed Lila’s face, and Tony sighed with relief. 

“I’ve got a playroom all set up,” he said. “There’s pizza for lunch, and ice cream if you’re good. There’s a pool outside, with a ton of floaties, extra bathing suits and towels if you didn’t bring yours. If you want to follow Dum-E? Dum-E, look sharp. Show our guests what you’ve been working on.” 

Again, the children looked to their mother. Laura nodded encouragingly. “Be sure to thank Mr. Stark.”

“Thank you,” they said, in tandem. 

“You’re welcome. Go have fun. If you need anything, just bother Happy. That’s what he’s there for,” he said, picking up the box of craft and art supplies and handing it to Happy, who rolled his eyes. 

“This way,” said Happy, and the kids and robots dutifully followed, Wanda trailing behind them. 

“They’ll be fine,” said Tony, detecting a trace of concern on Laura’s face. “Honestly, I wish I had Dum-E and U as nannies growing up. Well, I guess I almost did. I wasn’t much older than Cooper when I built Dum-E. And Happy will be watching.”

Laura shook her head, letting Nathanial slide down to stand on his own beside her. “You didn’t have to do all this, Mr. Stark.”

“Please, call me Tony. I know. I wanted to. Makes me feel better. Well. A little better, anyway. Have a seat. Can I offer you anything to drink? What about this little guy?” he said, looking at Nathaniel, who hid his face against his mother's leg. 

“Oh. Don’t worry about him. He’s going through a clingy phase. Maybe a lemonade?”

He left to get their drinks, returning a moment later. She’d brought a large tote and had pulled out a small baggie of Cheerios and a sippy cup for Nathanial. “Thank you,” she said, taking her glass of lemonade. 

They could hear Cooper and Lila’s voices from the other room. That was good, he thought. He’d let Happy buy most of the toys for the playroom, but Tony had made a few suggestions. Hopefully, they hadn’t misjudged too badly. 

Tony took a seat beside Laura on the couch, with Nathaniel in between. He knew he would have to be the first one to speak. After all, he’d brought her, and her entire family, all the way to his home for a reason. Nathaniel fussed, trying to wiggle around to see where his siblings had disappeared too. 

“Mrs. Barton. I wanted--” started Tony.

“Please, call me Laura,” she interrupted, gently.

“Laura,” he agreed, starting again. “Clint and I… well, we didn’t always see eye-to-eye.”

“I know,” she said, with a hint of a smile. “He talked about you a lot. He talked about all of you, his team. Sometimes in frustration. But mostly, with a lot of respect.”

Tony dropped his head. “About that day…”

Laura placed a hand on Tony’s arm, forcing him to look at her before she withdrew it. “I know the kind of man I married. Nothing he did surprised me. Not joining SHIELD. Not joining the Avengers. Not leaving when Steve called him for help in Germany. And certainly not on that day.”

He sat back, her gaze meeting his before she turned her attention back to her son.

~~

Bruce wouldn’t calm down, and it took three of them to stop him from hurting himself. Natasha and Sam got out of the way before they got knocked down. Laura Barton stepped back, but then came in close and placed a hand on Bruce’s chest. He looked wild-eyed at her. 

“Shhh,” she said. “It’ll be okay.” 

Then, to everyone’s surprise, she began to sing. Her voice was uneven, a little unsure and hesitant, but as she passed her hand through Bruce’s hair, he shuddered with relief, and her voice strengthened. 

“Once there was a way, to get back homeward. Once there was a way to get back home. Sleep pretty darling do not cry, and I will sing a lullaby.”

Bruce began to take deep breaths, and then he folded in on himself. Nick and Thor loosened their grip, and helped Bruce sit again in a chair. “Thank you,” said Thor to Laura.

Laura shrugged. “It helps my kids sometimes, when they’re upset.” She looked around, surprised to find herself at the center of everyone’s attention. Natasha had her head bowed, her hair covering her face. Laura took Bruce’s hand in hers, threading their fingers together. 

“I don’t know what it was like for Clint. I can’t share that with you. One minute we were all in the kitchen, together. Cooper was the first to go. Then Lila. Clint was holding Nathaniel when Nathaniel.... We looked at each other from across the kitchen. He tried to reach me…before.

“We knew, of course. Where ever we were, whatever plane of existence that was, when it came time for Clint to choose, we knew. It was like we were standing in a room in our house, the kids on one side, me on the other. We couldn’t reach him, we couldn’t speak, but I could see his face, and I knew what choice he had to make. Who to sacrifice, myself or the kids, or...”

She bowed her head, and looked down at her lap, still cradling Bruce’s hand in hers. With her free hand, she wiped at her eyes. 

“It was never really a question. He only took as long as he did to decide because he didn’t want to say goodbye. When he did make his choice, we were finally able to move. I ran to him. The kids rushed to his side. But he was gone before we reached him.”

She fell silent, then continued to hum “Golden Slumbers” under her breath. 

~~

Tony struggled with what to say. If he started to speak he might start rambling, and he didn’t want to do that. 

The voices from the other room rose in volume, and it sounded like maybe the kids were fighting, Happy trying to calm them down. 

Laura grimaced. “I’m sorry,” she said, rising. “I better go make sure they’re not about to start throwing things. Do you mind watching him? Thanks.”

She left before Tony could protest. Nathaniel followed her departure with his eyes, turning to see where she was going. He made a small noise of distress, and then turned back to look at Tony with an expression that clearly said, “Can you believe she just walked away and left me here?”

“She should be right back,” reasoned Tony. 

Nathaniel made another funny noise. He appeared to have gotten over his shyness, because he crawled over and climbed onto Tony’s lap. 

“Oh,” said Tony, afraid to touch. “I guess we’re doing this. Please don’t spit up on me, or bite me. Do me a favor, for the next few minutes don’t do anything a baby would do.”

"Not a baby," said Nathanial, very seriously.

Tony smiled. "My mistake."

He couldn’t remember if he’d ever had a small child sit on him before. He reminded himself that not that long ago, he’d wanted one of these for himself. Nathaniel wiggled around, making himself comfortable as he faced Tony. It was startling how much he looked like Clint. He had the same dark blue eyes. 

Nathaniel tried to climb up Tony’s chest, momentarily fascinated by the metal chest piece. “You like that?” asked Tony.

Concentrating hard, Nathaniel nodded, trying to see if he could lift the casing. Then, he patted Tony’s chest, gently. He patted Tony’s face and neck, his head, fascinated by Tony’s facial hair.

“That’s okay,” said Tony, grimacing but letting the baby do what he wanted. “Thanks for that.”

“Tow-nee,” said Nathaniel, snuggling close. 

“Hey, you know my name,” said Tony. 

Nathaniel slid even closer, his small face pressed against Tony’s neck. Tony brought his arm around to keep Nathaniel in place, afraid he might fall. Nathaniel’s sticky breath tickled Tony’s ear. 

“Present,” said Nathaniel, sitting in the crook of Tony’s arm. He held his small grubby hand out and then opened his palm. In the center lay the yellow brilliance of the Mind Stone. The light was blinding, casting patterns across the room. 

“Oh wow,” said Tony. “Would you look at that?” That is one serious choking hazard, he thought. He was very glad Nathaniel seemed smart enough to not try and swallow one of the most dangerous items in the entire universe, nor try to stick it up his nose. 

In all his innocent earnestness, Nathaniel offered Tony the Stone, like a gift. “Present,” he repeated. 

Tony closed Nathaniel’s hand, the light dimming in the room. “Thank you,” he said, and Nathaniel threw his arms around his neck. He stood up, carrying Nathaniel. “How ‘bout we go for a walk, huh buddy?”

“Okay,” said Nathaniel, his small fist held tight. 

Tony carried him over to the stairs and then down into his lab. He figured he had this whole baby thing down, easy peasy, no problem. He shifted Nathaniel easily in his arms, weaving through the mess of his lab—the Shelby Cobra was still only half way rebuilt. “Check this out,” he said to Nathaniel, removing the cloth he’d thrown over the gauntlet. The jewels glowed in rainbow colors. “What do you have to say to that, huh?”

Nathaniel shouted something incomprehensive. 

“My thoughts exactly,” said Tony. Nathaniel lunged for the gauntlet, but Tony held him tight. “Want to show me where your present goes?” 

Making a lot of earnest little grunts, Nathaniel took the Mind Stone and drooled all over Tony’s hand as he held him over the gauntlet. Nathaniel dropped the Stone in place, then Tony turned to shield him from the shock wave.

“Good job, buddy,” said Tony. 

Nathaniel clapped his hands. “Good job,” he said. 

Tony heard a noise by the stairs and turned to see Wanda. “What are you doing?” she asked as she made her way through the lab to where they stood. 

“Oh,” said Tony. “Just hanging out with my new best friend.”

Wanda looked from Tony to Nathaniel’s shiny face, then over to the exposed experimental gauntlet, its dull metal finish contrasting with the array of brilliant Stones. 

They had discussed, early on, using the Mind Stone and placing it back with Vision. Plans were made, and Shuri had started to see how it could be done, if it could be done. But before they got very far, Wanda asked them to stop. “You don’t want him back?” asked Shuri.

“Yes,” she answered. “But not with that. He wouldn’t want it, and I don’t want it. It cost too much.”

She was the only one with the right, so they stopped. Vision’s body was kept in Wakanda, were Shuri could try and repair the damage Thanos caused when he ripped the Stone from his head. She sent progress reports, but it could take years, and could still fail. 

In the lab, Wanda stepped forward and looked down at the gauntlet, then back at Tony. “Did you get what you need?” she asked. 

“Yeah,” he answered. 

Upon seeing Wanda, Nathaniel made a happy noise of recognition. She smiled fondly at him, and reached to take him from Tony’s arms. Something new and tender ached inside Tony, but he didn’t protest and let the child go.

Wanda held Nathaniel for a moment, but then let him walk on his one. They held hands as they crossed the lab, but she paused by the stairs. “Are you coming?” she asked Tony. “We’re about to start lunch.”

Tony took a breath, throwing the fabric back over the gauntlet. “Yup,” he said. “Right behind you.”

~~

Midnight, and he was lying in bed, not sleeping, watching shadows creep across this bedroom, listening to the waves crashing. 

Friday beeped. “Boss, you wanted to know if there was anything out of the ordinary with Peter Parker.”

Instant fear flooded his system. It was three o’clock in the morning in New York. The kid was supposed to be asleep in his bed. “What is it?”

“For the last two hours he’s been perched at the top of the Chrysler Building, and hasn’t moved.”

Tony had put the tracker back into Peter’s suit, into both his suits. He knew Peter hated it, but it gave Tony a small amount of comfort. “Put me through.”

It took a little longer than usual for Peter to answer, and that only made Tony more anxious. “Hey, Mr. Stark,” said a resigned Peter. “You know, it’s like three in the morning over here.”

“Zip it,” said Tony. “I think that’s my line. What are you doing out at this time of night?”

“I’m on patrol,” said Peter, defensively. 

Tony paused. “I said don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not,” insisted Peter. 

They fell silent, Tony struggling with how much to push. “Pete, talk to me.”

Peter sighed. “I’m okay, Mr. Stark. You don’t have to worry about me.”

But that’s what I do, thought Tony. Don’t take it away from me. Tony decided to change tactics. “Okay. So, you’re on patrol? What have you seen tonight?”

“Well. I saw this guy drag a…um, lady, by the arm down the street. Looked like he was going to hit her, so I stopped that.”

“Uh huh,” said Tony, carefully.

“And these two thugs were trying to break into one of those copy places, but it turned out to be just a couple of employees.”

“Right.”

“Oh and, there was this guy, standing on the Triborough Bridge, on the railing. He was gonna jump.” 

Damn. “Peter--”

“I called the cops,” interrupted Peter. “They got him down. But he kept saying, he didn’t think all of him came back. He was like me. You know, turned to dust, the half that was gone. And he didn’t think all of him came back. He kept saying parts of him were missing.”

“You did the right thing, calling the cops.”

On the other end, Tony could hear Peter’s breathing, but it mixed with the wind from the Chrysler Building. “It got me thinking. I don’t know why you brought me back, Mr. Stark.”

Every inch of Tony’s body seized up. “Peter, you’re giving an old man a heart attack over here.”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Stark. I don’t mean to scare you. I’d never do something like that. Honest. I’m just…checking out the view.”

He tried to steady his breathing. “Do me a favor, let’s let New York take care of itself for the rest of the night? What do you say? Time you went home.”

“Okay, Mr. Stark.”

“I’m going to stay on the line with you until you’re in your apartment.”

“Sure thing,” said Peter, and bless him, although Tony could tell Peter was slightly out of breath, webslinging his way across Manhattan and into Queens, he talked to Tony the whole way. “Okay, I’m here, Mr. Stark. Oh shit.”

“What? What is it?” asked Tony.

“Aunt May is awake.”

Tony took in a quiet shuddering breath. Thank God for Aunt May. “Well, you kind of had that coming.”

“Yeah,” agreed Peter with a huffy laugh. “I better go, Mr. Stark.”

He ended the call before Tony could say goodbye. For the rest of the night, Tony stared at the ceiling, letting the adrenalin bleed out of him. 

~~

After Wanda and the Barton family left, Tony barricaded himself even more into his lab. When even the lab began to suffocate him too much, he enclosed himself in armor and took to the skies. He spent hours in the upper atmosphere, going as high as he could manage without actually going into space, staring at the curve of the planet, at the line of horizon between life and emptiness. 

His heads up display beeped, and he saw that someone had rung the doorbell of his front door. “Ugh. Who is it now?”

“James Buchanan Barnes is here to see you, boss,” said Friday, with a tone of disbelieving shock, piping in the feed from his front door. Barnes had stepped back, gazing at the house from a foot back.

Tony peered down at Earth like he could see from almost a hundred miles up. He was informed of Barnes’s provisional parole, under the recognizance of the Avengers, but the last place he thought Barnes would go would be Tony’s doorstep. “What does he want?”

“Should I ask him?” asked Friday. 

Tony sighed. He was tempted to turn Barnes away—out of spite and because he could—but he knew that would get him nowhere. If Barnes was here that meant Wilson was out of commission. And his curiosity got the better of him. “No, I guess. Have the robots show him to the lab. Don’t let him touch anything. And don’t let him out of your sight.”

He flew back, swooping into the lab, repulsors at the ready. Barnes was surrounded by Dum-E and U, looking bemused and bewildered. Both robots were on high alert. U had stretched to its full height, trying to match Barnes, and Dum-E had latched onto Barnes’s metal arm. Except it looked like Dum-E was trying to hold Barnes’s hand like it had with Lila. 

“All right,” said Tony. “You can let him go.”

The robots beeped and chirped, asking for confirmation. Dum-E hesitated, but then released Barnes’s arm, rolling a few feet away. 

Barnes was in his usual hobo-chic style of clothing, but without a baseball cap, and Tony’s sensors didn’t pick up any weapons besides that arm. Barnes looked at Tony nervously, but otherwise didn’t move.

“I was expecting Wilson,” said Tony. 

Barnes’s expression tightened, then he shook his head in the negative. 

Tony sighed, then landed and retracted the facemask, letting the armor retreat back into its housing. Barnes watched the nanotech with curious interest. Yeah, that’s right, thought Tony. Let’s see how a fight between the two of us goes this time, pal. But Tony had to admit it took some balls for Barnes, of all people, to show up at his house like this. 

“Would you like a drink?” asked Tony, throwing Barnes off guard. 

“Uh. Sure,” said Barnes.

“Oh good. He speaks. Take a seat, Sergeant.” He went over to the fridge, and poured two glasses of his chlorophyll drink for the both of them. 

Barnes was looking around, unsure where to sit. Dum-E helpfully pushed over a rolling chair for him. He muttered, “Thanks,” then took his seat. 

Tony handed him his drink, then grabbed a second chair, and they sat staring at each other. Barnes inspected his drink and took a hesitant sip. 

“So,” started Tony. “Wilson. How bad off is he?”

Tony watched Barnes try to decide if he liked the drink or if he thought it was disgusting. Barnes met his eyes. “Struggling.”

~~

Laura stopped humming, and another heavy silence settled over the room. One by one, everyone turned to look at Sam Wilson and James Barnes. Sam began cursing under his breath, sitting in a chair with his head in his hands. He looked up when he realized everyone was waiting for him. 

“Oh. So it’s my turn now? You all looking at me, you want me to tell you how it was? What it was like? What it was like for me to stand there and not move and just let him…”

Sam’s voice was tight, strained. He wasn’t able to breathe. He shook his head. 

“I wish he hadn’t done it,” he continued. “I know why he did. I know him. We all know him. It’s not a mystery why he did it. We don’t have to struggle to understand. But I wish he hadn’t. He didn’t need to. He could have picked me. I’d take his place. In a heartbeat. It would be better if it were me.”

Sam pointed at his chest, struggling to find his breath enough to speak again. He turned to look at Barnes, who sat on his left. 

“They made him choose between us,” said Sam to the room but while he was looking at Barnes. “But he wouldn’t ever do that.”

Tony watched Barnes break. Up until then, Barnes was holding it together, staring at the floor with a vacant expression. But when Sam turned to him, his entire face changed and he went red trying to hold it in. “No,” croaked Barnes. “He would never.”

“He would never have let anyone make him do that,” agreed Sam. “He’d die first.” Then, he turned to face the room, but he wasn’t looking at anyone in particular. “We couldn’t move. I couldn’t say anything. If I could have, I would have told him to pick me. But all I could do was watch. Just there to watch--”

Sam stopped talking, his breath even more labored than before, like he suffered from asthma. It kicked Barnes into action and he leaned in to speak quietly to Sam so only Sam could hear. They both were crying by then, two grown men openly struggling not to fall apart in front of God and everyone. Tony stood, and turned away. 

~~

Barnes took another sip of his drink. Then he took a third sip, and Tony figured the drink must have passed the test. Either that or Barnes wanted to avoid talking so much he didn’t care how disgusting the drink was. 

“And what about you?” asked Tony. “You seem to be doing okay. Are you…struggling?”

Barnes narrowed his eyes for a second, causing Tony’s heart rate to rise, but then he shook his head. “I’ve just had longer practice at it,” said Barnes. 

“What do you mean?” asked Tony. 

“At twelve years old Steve stepped in front of a gun during a hold up at our corner grocer’s. Left him with a small scar, on his left side, from where the bullet grazed him.” Barnes touched his side to indicate where. “Saved my kid sister that day. Before they gave him the serum, he jumped on a dummy grenade to save a bunch of lousy recruits that never stopped making fun of him. Then, he buried a plane in the ice to save the world. That’s not even counting what he did in the war. Or what he’s done since coming out of the ice. The serum only matched the outside with the inside. The little punk was born like that.”

For some reason, that made Tony laugh. It shouldn’t have been funny, but they both grinned, and for a moment they forgot who they were to each other. 

“Sam is like Steve,” said Barnes, continuing to explain. “It’s killing him, that Steve chose himself instead of Sam. That Sam couldn’t be the one to choose. He already lost one friend, during his time in Afghanistan. Couldn’t do anything to stop it then. And couldn’t do anything to stop it now. It’s a lot. Too much.”

“Will Sam be okay?” asked Tony.

Barnes shrugged in a way that said it was anyone’s guess. “I hope so. Steve gave his life for us. I won’t throw that away. Even knowing I’m not worth it. Not like Sam is. I’m not worth any of this. But it’s the last thing he gave me. So I’ll go on. I’ll try to make him proud. Somehow. Try to help people. Maybe make up for some of it.”

The silence between them stretched on for too long with a myriad of unsaid things. Tony swiveled his chair, turning away. 

“I know there’s nothing I can say to you,” said Barnes, his voice turning raspy and thin. “No way to… apologize. For what I did.”

“Then don’t try.”

Barnes closed his eyes. He took a shaky breath, then nodded. He’d been dry-eyed for most of their conversation, but now he took his flesh hand and rubbed at his eyes. Tony also felt the sting of tears, but he refused to acknowledge it.

“Steve wouldn’t want you to lock yourself away down here,” said Barnes. 

Tony made a face, his chest thumping with a spark of anger. “Do me a favor, and don’t talk to me about what I should or shouldn’t be doing. Rogers barely had the right to tell me what to do. You definitely don’t.”

Barnes’s expression hardened, and he swallowed his next words, jaw muscles working too hard. But Tony knew he hadn’t shut Barnes up yet, and he wondered briefly why he was putting up with it. 

“Natasha blames herself,” said Barnes. “She won’t admit it, but she thinks she should have done like Steve and Clint did. Refuse to choose.” Tony swiveled the chair back to face Barnes. “I know you think that too. And you’ve been punishing yourself this whole time. I’m telling you,” said Barnes, not letting himself be intimidated. “That’s bullshit. There’s no right choice. Or better choice. There’s no such thing. And you can’t do anything if you’re gone. ‘Cause then you’re just gone. And what good is that?”

Barnes held his left hand out, the dull metal so similar to the metal of the gauntlet that it gave Tony chills. The slats shifted, and in the center of his palm, he saw the bright blue Space Stone. 

~~

The gauntlet was almost complete. He couldn’t delay any longer. 

Happy made the arrangements with May Parker and Peter’s school. After Peter’s recent behavior, both Tony and May were concerned, and Tony agreed to take Peter for the rest of his junior year, to give the kid a change of scenery. He’d continue his studies independently, and return the following year. 

He and May had spoken over a video conference call. She’d looked tired and worried. 

“I’m going against my better judgment here. Promise me, you’ll take care of him,” said May. “You can’t have him superheroing around. He doesn’t need that now. Promise me.”

He had looked her dead in the eye. “Absolutely,” he said, like the liar he knew he was.

Two weeks later, and Tony found himself watching Peter move with restrained excitement through the lab. It was going to take time to get used to having him there. 

Peter rushed over to Dum-E. “Oh, check this out,” he cried. “Is this…the original Dum-E?”

“Just about,” said Tony, trailing behind. “The first Dum-E got damaged a few years back. But I made this one from the same parts. Basically the same.”

“I heard you were my age when you built him.” 

“I was…” Tony made a face, thinking back. “Sixteen? Somewhere around there. A lot more immature than you.”

Peter grinned before wandering over to the display containing his older suits, his hand tentatively touching the red and gold metal. Tony went to stand beside him. 

“Mr. Stark?”

“Yeah? By the way, I think you can call me Tony now.”

Peter’s laughed nervously. He shook his head. “Thank you. I…I didn’t think you wanted to see me.”

Tony couldn’t have hated himself more if he tried. Peter looked vulnerable and uncertain. Tony gripped him where neck met shoulder, squeezing as hard as he dared. “I’m sorry if I led you to think that. It was never you.”

Peter took his time looking at Tony, then he nodded haltingly. 

“Can I show you something?” asked Tony. “I may need your help. If you’re willing.”

“Of course,” stammered Peter, too eager. “Anything you need. Anything at all.”

Turning so Peter couldn’t see his face, Tony winced as he led the way to the dark corner of the lab. He had to fight the urge to bundle Peter up and ship him back to New York. Instead, he schooled his face, grinned at the kid’s enthusiasm, and showed him the experimental gauntlet. 

“Oh my God,” said Peter, the jewels’ multicolored light reflecting across his face. “Is that…?”

“Sure is. Take a good look. But maybe don’t touch. Tell me what you see.”

“It’s a lighter design than the other one. Is the metal vibranium?” Tony nodded. “Is it strong enough?”

Tony shrugged. “Should be. It’s a vibranium alloy. But that’s only part of the problem. It has to harness the Stones, make them work together. And remember, the old one broke apart when he used all six Stones. What would you do, to improve that?”

Peter’s forehead creased as he looked at the gauntlet, tilting his head. “You’re saying all six Stones will overload it. Unless,” he turned to Tony, but his eyes were on the nanotech chest piece. “If you use nanotech, it might be adaptable enough to balance against that kind of power.”

Tony grinned, bringing up the tech schematics for the interlay between suit and nanotech and gauntlet, arranging the holographic displays for Peter to review. “You and I are one of the few that saw that gauntlet in real action. We know what a device intended to harness that power requires.”

Peter looked down at the gauntlet, peering at the palm where an empty space remained. “You’re missing a Stone.”

“Am I?” asked Tony. He lifted his hand, and aimed his palm at Peter. In the center lay the Soul Stone, in the same place a repulser beam would be. The golden amber light arced across the room, bathed Peter in its beam. 

Peter met his eyes. “You’re going to bring them back,” said Peter.

“I’m going to try,” said Tony. 

The light grew and grew, until Tony closed his hand, and the lab returned to normal. “What happens next?” asked Peter. 

“Well. You’re going to help me finish the suit. And then, we make the call, and the Avengers assemble.”

~~

Almost a year after Thanos, the Asgardian refugee ship entered orbit around Earth before landing on a field in Wakanda. Friday brought up the news feed, and Tony watched the footage of the Asgardians exiting their ship, with the Wakandans lined up to greet them. 

In the corner of the lab, the newly completed suit gleamed in the light. Next to it, already laid out in a special case, was the gauntlet. He walked over to the suit, and took his phone out to call Happy. “It’s time,” he said into his phone. “Yes, I’m sure.”

He hung up, then double tapped the suit’s chest piece, watching as the suit returned to its housing. He removed his old chest piece and replaced it with the new one. 

The location didn’t need to be Wakanda. It was just easier that way, and Tony liked the poetry of it, the symmetry. 

Thor, Valkyrie, Barnes, Wilson, and of course T’Challa were already in Wakanda. Bruce arrived by astral portal, with Dr Strange right behind him. Due to the flight restrictions in and out of Wakanda, T’Challa provided transport for Tony, Peter, Nick Fury, and Laura Barton. Her children joined her, but except for Cooper, the two youngest would remain in the palace. When Tony had a chance to question her, she shrugged. “Cooper insisted,” she said. “And he has the right.” 

He wanted Rhodes and Wanda there as well. The only one Tony had concerns about was Natasha. When she wanted to disappear, the woman could vanish, and Happy had no way of contacting her. But, on the morning they convened more or less on the spot where Thanos had stood, Natasha Romanoff strolled in through the morning fog, right on time. 

Okoye frowned at her. “Where did you come from?” she asked.

Natasha shrugged. “From that way,” she said, nodded in the direction she came in, vaguely westward. 

“How did she..?” asked Okoye, frowning at T’Challa.

“Best not to ask, I think,” answered T’Challa, with a grudging smile. 

With a glance at the bewildered Wakandans, Tony gripped Natasha’s shoulder in greeting. “Glad you could join us.”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” she said. She looked better, dressed in her customary black uniform, her hair pulled back. She went to stand beside Bruce, subtly taking his hand in hers. Nick strode over to her, peering down from his greater height. She gave him a lopsided smile, and then Nick shook his head but took his place beside her.

“All right,” said Tony, taking a deep breath as he faced the others, everyone forming a loose circle. “We’re just waiting for a few more. Dr. Strange? If you would be so kind.”

Dr. Strange rested his gaze on the case with the gauntlet, before nodding. He did his wizard thing, waving his hands around, mystical gestures sparking, and a large portal opened in the center of their circle. Out stepped Nebula and Rocket, and then behind them the rest of the Guardians of the Galaxy. 

“Wow,” said Quill, thumbs in his belt. “So this is Earth.” He made a face as he looked around. “Doesn’t look familiar.”

“You’re in Africa, Quill,” said Tony. “Not Missouri. Could you take your places, please?” 

“All right, jeez,” said Quill. “Keep your panties on.” He took his time, sizing up the group as he moved beside Rocket and Nebula. 

“Well, we all know why we’re here,” said Tony, glancing quickly around. He knew full well that controlling this motley group of crazies for any length of time would be almost as much a miracle as what he was about to attempt, so he didn’t want to waste any more time. “I suggest we get this show on the road.”

He pressed a button on the gauntlet case. The nanotech retracted and reformed, revealing the gauntlet for all to see. The tension in the group visibly increased. Thor gripped his axe tighter. Okoye took a warrior stance. 

Tony stood in front of the gauntlet. The moment of truth. His hands were sweating and he felt sick to his stomach. His ears were ringing. Under the Wakandan sun, the gauntlet looked almost pretty. Really, he thought his gauntlet was a lot less ostentatious than the previous one, if he did say so himself. The design was flawless. 

“Hold up, Tony,” said Natasha. “Are you sure about this?”

“What do you mean ‘am I sure?’” he asked. “What do you think we’re all gathered here for?”

“But Tony,” said Bruce. “Think about it. All six Stones? You’re not going to come back from that.”

“What?” asked Peter, shocked and alarmed. “Is that true, Mr. Stark?”

“You’ve had months to protest, and you wait until now?” Tony felt his heartbeat in his ears, pounding. The situation was slipping out of his control. 

“What I want to know,” interjected Quill. “Is why he’s the one that gets to wear it? Who made that decision?”

“I did,” said Tony, cutting through the rising chatter. 

“It has to be one of the six,” said Nebula, calmly. Ah yes, he thought, looking at her. They nodded to each other. “You weren’t there, Quill,” she continued. “You have no idea.”

“I was just asking,” said Quill, shrugging. 

More conversation and debate filtered through the crowd. If Tony was feeling generous, he knew that Quill was suffering. He could see it in his puffed up swagger. But, Tony hadn’t gone through the last twelve months to continue debating this. The decision was made, and he wouldn’t back down now. 

“Mr. Stark, wait,” said Peter, raising his hands up, moving toward the gauntlet.

“I’m sorry, kid,” said Tony. He double tapped on his chest piece, feeling his suit close around him. Before anyone else could speak, he took his left hand and inserted into the gauntlet. The suit overtook it, taking in the gauntlet and the Stones.

A small shock wave burst out, silencing everyone. Tony went down to his knees. The suit rippled, fluctuating in rainbow colors as the power surged through him. 

“Oh shit,” he said, and felt the nanotech struggle to find a balance with the overwhelming power of the Stones coursing through the suit, and through him. He glanced around and saw everyone’s concern. Mostly, he saw Peter. 

Not taking any chances, he activated his thrusters and shot straight up into the sky. He went higher and higher although he didn’t know if there was a great enough distance. It was now or never. He had to make his choice. 

He held everything in his mind, and then he closed his left fist. Another shock wave, greater and larger than before, burst out of him in rainbow-colored brilliance. 

~~

The silence in the conference room was oppressive, especially with so many bodies in one place breathing in the same air, and no one speaking. They looked at him, waiting for him. Pressure built inside of Tony, like he was deep diving and his brain was about to leak out of his ears. 

His throat was dry. “When I took hold of the Soul Stone, it brought me back. To that cave, in Afghanistan. It was exactly like I’d never left. Couldn’t see who was speaking, but whoever it was, they made me choose. I had to choose. It was between… between Pepper and…”

He couldn’t go on. Peter’s face drained of color, and he struggled to keep from crying. It was too cruel to continue, for both of them. It was incredibly painful to look at Peter, so young and alive, but only there because of his choice.

“You didn’t,” stuttered Peter. “You didn’t have to do that, Mr. Stark. You should have picked--”

Tony clamped one hand over Peter’s mouth. “Stop,” he said, pressing his forehead to Peter’s. He waited until Peter nodded, then he let go. 

Peter took a shuddering breath, and then the room fell silent again. 

“I don’t know why I did that,” he said, and he wasn’t looking at anyone. Wasn’t looking at anything at all. The hand he’d held over Peter’s mouth burned, damp from Peter’s saliva and tears, and he saw the Stone lying there. Just lying there. “I could have chosen myself. Why I didn’t…” He flexed his left hand open, then close. “Why didn’t I do that? I’ve got to believe I’m alive for a reason.”

He shifted to face the room. 

“This isn’t the end. I will find some way to fix this.”

They didn’t believe him, but then, what choice did they have?

~~

When he closed his fist and snapped his fingers, he asked the universe for everything he could. He asked for Pepper Potts. He asked for Steve Rogers. He asked for Maria Hill. He asked for Clint Barton. He asked for Jane Foster. And he asked for the Hulk to return to Bruce. Then, he pushed for more. He asked for Vision, for the hole in his head to close and his spirit to remain without the aid of the Mind Stone. He asked for those that died on the Wakandan field when Thanos’s army attacked. He asked for the Asgardians Thanos killed when he took the Space Stone. He asked for Heimdall. And though he knew he might regret it, he asked for Loki, because having a god of mischief in your debt might not be a bad idea, and because he owed Thor. He asked for Gamora, because he knew the pain Nebula and Quill felt. Their loss was his loss. Finally, he asked for those distant and unknown, those from a place called Xandar, who died first. 

In reply, the universe asked, “And for all this, what will you give?”

~~

The suit learned to work with the gauntlet, and they became one, shifting the power forward, pushing it back, arranging it around and around, the constant dance of rainbow dizzying in its effect. 

Tony looked down at the distant Earth below his feet. He started his descent, the golden rainbow light everywhere. His friends were held in place, locked in time, with the rainbow weaving in and out and around. He saw shock and wonder, he saw awe in each of their faces as they gazed up to the sky, searching for him. 

They couldn’t move, and didn’t see him land. He turned to Peter and let his helmet melt away so he could see Peter with his own two eyes. 

When Tony touched him, Peter blinked, and took a breath. “Mr. Stark!” he cried, looking around at the light and the others frozen in time. “You’re okay. Did it work?”

“Almost,” replied Tony. “One more thing needs to happen. Will you come with me?”

Peter didn’t hesitate, and Tony took him by the hand, skin on skin. He wanted that connection. With the gauntlet, he opened a portal to a distant planet. Take that, Dr. Strange, he thought. And they stepped through together. 

Perpetual evening, a planet of storm, of rolling wet sand dunes. Somehow without ever being told, he knew the way. They started walking toward the mountain. 

“Where are we, Mr. Stark?” asked Peter, looking around. 

“A planet, somewhere,” he answered. He didn’t actually know where, except that it was so far away from Earth they might as well be in another dimension. “Hang on, we’re going to take a shortcut.”

He held Peter around the waist, and they flew up to the top of the mountain. 

“What are we doing here?” asked Peter, shivering a little. 

“This is the last part of the mission,” said Tony, avoiding looking at Peter. “Before we can go home.”

They landed on icy rock. Tony didn’t let go of Peter’s hand. In the distance but coming closer, he saw a dark figure approaching. It was just like his dream, from the cave—a shrouded specter, with its face hidden. But this time, the specter wasn’t behind him. It was in front.

“Uh, Mr. Stark, there’s a dementor coming toward us,” piped Peter, his voice high. 

“A what?” asked Tony. “What I tell you about making pop culture references?”

“Sorry. Last one, I promise. Just don’t let it kiss us.”

Tony ignored the ghost that floated toward them. He had been avoiding looking at Peter, afraid his resolve would falter, but he took a moment to look at him now. Peter’s nose was red from the cold, but he was alert, tense. It was still incredibly painful to look at him, even after all these months. “Don’t promise me that,” said Tony.

Peter was too preoccupied with the approaching specter, but he heard the change in Tony’s tone. He was a smart kid. Far too trusting, but it wouldn’t take him long to figure it out. 

Tony turned back to face the ghost as it hovered a few feet in front of them. “Welcome, Anthony,” said the ghost. “Son of Howard.” He turned slightly. “Peter, son of Richard.”

He felt Peter pinch his hand. “You know why I’m here,” he said to the ghost. 

“I do,” said the ghost, then he floated closer, out of the shadows. Tony wasn’t prepared for the gaunt, blood red face. It brought a host of nightmares with it, the boogey man in the closet. He felt he understood Steve Rogers a little better, looking into that face. The Red Skull came close enough to inspect him up and down before turning to do the same to Peter. “But are you prepared?”

“Holy shit,” cried Peter. “Is that…?”

“Steady,” said Tony, keeping a tight hold on Peter’s hand but with his attention on the ghost. “Yes. I’m prepared.”

The Red Skull paused without turning away, and Tony didn’t dare even breathe. “Then come with me,” said the Red Skull. 

He followed the ghost and felt the first sign of resistance from Peter. He knew it was coming, but it broke Tony’s heart. Peter tugged on his hand. “Wait. Mr. Stark, I don’t understand. What…what are you doing?”

“What has to be done,” he said. Peter tried to twist his hand free, but Tony grabbed him around the waist. Peter was strong of course, but no match for the suit. He would drag Peter if he had to. “Don’t fight me, kid.”

Peter was wily and hard to keep a hold of. “Wait, no. Mr. Stark. You don’t have to do this.”

“Just a little further,” said Tony, stumbling after the ghost. They reached the summit, the wind was biting cold, swooping up the side of the mountain. They were miles above the surface. God, what a desolate place. He stared out into a barren landscape. 

“No, wait, Mr. Stark. Please. Tony,” cried Peter, arms flailing, his voice cracking. He was crying now. The use of his first name made Tony cringe inside. “You don’t have to do this. Listen to me. If this is what you need, to fix this, then…then, I accept. I’ll do it. I’ll go. You don’t have to make me. Please. It’s okay. It has to be me, I know. It’s okay, just please Mr. Stark, you don’t have to do this.”

Everything inside Tony turned to dust. Each one of Peter’s words were like pieces of shrapnel digging their way toward his heart. “Jesus Christ, Peter,” he said. 

“It’s okay, Mr. Stark. It’s okay. I understand.”

He clamped his hand over Peter’s mouth to stop him. They were both crying. He brought Peter into his arms, hugging him tight. Peter was sobbing now, struggling with his breath. They clung to each other. He was dimly aware of the silent Red Skull floating nearby, patiently watching them with avid attention. 

Tony took a deep breath, then pushed Peter away from him. With his ungauntleted hand, he wiped away Peter’s tears. Tony was having difficulty breathing, but he didn’t stop. He tapped on his chest piece and felt the suit leave him. It had been holding the cold at bay, and as it disappeared into the chest piece, taking the gauntlet and the Stones with it so the entire thing was held inside, he felt the ice cold spike into him, the wind slicing through his clothing. 

He saw the moment Peter realized what he was doing, following Tony’s movements. He tried to stop him, but Tony blocked him. “Wait. No, Mr. Stark. What are you doing?”

The suit, the gauntlet, the Stones, were tucked away. He removed the chest piece and then attached it to Peter’s suit. “It has to be this way.”

“No, no. Mr. Stark. That’s wrong. Not you.” Peter tried to stop him but the suit knew what it needed to do, and it latched on to Peter then prevented him from moving. “Not you, Mr. Stark. Me. Tell him,” he turned to the Red Skull. “Tell him it’s supposed to be me. Not him,” he turned back to Tony. “Not you.”

The Red Skull floated closer. “He has made his choice,” he said. 

“No!” cried Peter, trying to get rid of the chest piece but it wouldn’t budge.

Tony shook his head, placing a hand over Peter’s to stop him. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do this alone, that I couldn’t do this without you. That I had to bring you here. I didn’t choose you, not for this. The suit, and the Infinity Stones, will take you home. They’re coded for you.” 

Peter shook his head, begging. Tony held his left palm open, where the Soul Stone lay. He took it from his palm and placed against Peter’s palm, closing his fist. 

“Tell Pepper I love her,” he said, then he turned and stepped off the cliff, letting gravity take him. 

The wind cut straight through him. The noise rushed his ears, louder and louder as he picked up speed. It was a long way down, but all too soon the ground came up and---”

~~

He sat up. Tony recognized the cave again, but this time it was quiet, peaceful. It wasn’t really the cave, he realized, just some approximation of it: the impression of it, leftover in his dreams, the shape of it. 

A man was sitting just inside the lip of the cave, facing the light that came in from the outside. He turned and looked at Tony, beckoning him over. 

The man was the Red Skull. Then he was Raza. Then he was Obadiah, then Howard. He was all those things until Tony got closer, close enough to really see him. 

“It’s you,” said Tony. 

“Yes,” said Yinsen with that hint of a smile Tony had come to know so well playing on his lips. “Please, sit beside me.”

Tony took his seat. Yinsen turned slightly toward him, and placed a hand over Tony’s chest. 

“Tell me, how is that heart of ours?” asked Yinsen. 

“Um. Can’t complain, I guess,” said Tony. 

“I am sure you will find a way,” answered Yinsen. 

They both laughed a little. Tony was in no hurry to move, but he felt the pull of the light calling him, the cave opening beckoning him forward. “I tried not to waste it, you know. My life.”

“Yes, I see,” said Yinsen, conversationally. “If there’s one thing that can be said of Tony Stark it is that he does not hold anything back. Perhaps I had some small part to play in what you have become, and for that I am honored. Would you say you are still a man who has everything and nothing?”

Tony shook his head, his throat too tight to answer.

“So then, what do you want, Stark? And what will you give?”

“I just want Pepper to live. And the others. You can have everything I am.”

Yinsen looked at him for a long time. Then, he nodded. He indicated the cave opening, and the light. “What you want lies that way,” he said, pointing. 

The light grew stronger, turning into the colors of a California sunset. It started taking over the inside of the cave. He hesitated, turning to Yinsen. “For what else did you save me, if not for this?”

“For what else, indeed?” answered Yinsen, swallowed up by the light until he was just an outline. “For everything you are. For another choice.”

But before Tony could demand more of an answer, Yinsen disappeared entirely. Soon, Tony couldn’t see anything at all. He tried to go forward, but there was no ground, and he was falling. Again. Or maybe he’d never stopped. The air was cold and the wind roared in his ears. The light grew blindingly bright.

“I’ve got you,” yelled Peter, flying fast toward him in the Infinity Suit, holding his left hand out, the Soul Stone’s beam wrapping around Tony. “Don’t worry, Mr. Stark. I’ve got you.”

Peter caught him before he hit the ground. “Thanks, kid. I owe you one.”

~~

Peter took charge. He swooped up, inches from crashing, flying into the dark sky. He held Tony in his arms. Tony was disoriented, uncertain which way was up and which way was down. But he trusted Peter, so it was okay. As they flew into the air, Peter opened a portal and they flew straight through it and back to the other side of the universe. 

Much of it was a blur. They landed among the falling leaves of Wakanda, into the circle of their friends. After the darkness of Vormir, everything in Wakanda was too bright. He was unsteady on his feet after Peter let him go. 

“Oh my God, Tony. Are you okay? I was so worried.”

He had trouble focusing his eyes, but he didn’t need to see to recognize the long strawberry hair worn in a ponytail. She rushed into his arms and squeezed him tight. She smelled like Pepper, she felt like her. He pressed his face against her neck. 

“Honey,” he said, his entire body striving to get as close to her as he could. “Pepper.”

The noise around him slowly infiltrated his awareness. Everywhere around him he saw a reunion. Without letting Pepper go, he saw Steve Rogers trying to hold both Sam and Barnes, looking happier than Tony had ever seen him. Steve had one hand cupping Sam’s face, and the other gripping tight to Barnes’s neck. Sam was openly crying, while Barnes struggled and kept wiping at his face. A little distance away he saw Natasha with Maria, their heads bent together in conversation as Nick beamed at both of them, his hands on his waist. Someone had brought Lila and Nathaniel Barton down from the palace. He saw Clint and Laura hugging while surrounded by all three of their children. He saw the completely unexpected and wonderful sight of the Hulk sitting under a tree with Valkyrie, someone who must be Heimdall, and Loki gathered (somewhat unwillingly judging by their expressions) in his big green arms, like he was trying to keep a bushel of cantankerous puppies from wandering away. Beside the Hulk, he saw Thor and Jane. Jane was beating at Thor’s chest, hitting him with her fists before she paused, took a breath, and hugged him. That seemed fitting, thought Tony. Thor sighed in relief.

He looked further, and saw Wanda and Vision together. Quill was completely in tears, crying like a baby, held by a striking green-skinned woman that could only be Gamora. Gamora held Quill, but she was looking at her sister. Nebula tentatively reached out a hand. 

Further afield, he saw the Wakandans, with expressions of soft joy on their faces, having many reunions of their own, mixing with the Asgardian refugees, whose numbers had doubled. Somewhere far away, he hoped there were more reunions happening. 

He held Pepper closer, until she pulled back to look at him. 

She had other reunions, as Natasha approached and Laura Barton joined them. Tony walked through the milling crowd, searching for one face in particular. Eventually, he found Peter sitting with his back against a tree, outside the circle of activity. 

The Infinity Suit was encased again into the chest piece, leaving Peter with messy hair and his Spider-Man suit. He looked up when he saw Tony approach. Without waiting for an invitation, Tony sat beside him, close enough for their shoulders to touch. Neither spoke, but eventually Peter detached the chest piece—it released easily now—and handed it to Tony who slapped it back in its place on his sternum. The chest piece had changed when it incorporated the gauntlet and the other Stones, shimmering in a glimmery rainbow light. 

Peter held out his left hand, and the Soul Stone lay in the exact center. “Did you know the Soul Stone wouldn’t take you?”

“No,” Tony said with a smile. “The plan was for it to take me.”

“What happened? Not that I want you gone!” he added with a rush. 

Tony grinned. He wasn’t certain he knew what happened. “I don’t know if I can explain it,” he said. “In order to use the Stone, I had to lose someone I love. If I refused to choose the first time, I wouldn’t have been able to fix anything. If I’d chosen Pepper over you—” he paused, making sure Peter was looking at him. “We might not have reversed the snap.”

Peter glanced down at his hand again. “And this time? You didn’t pick me again?”

Tony gripped the back of Peter’s neck. “I wouldn’t have done that. I couldn’t value my life over yours, or anyone else’s. I’d learned that much. I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t have worked if I’d chosen you. Something else would have been wrong. I would have lost her again. It costs to use the Stone. I made the only choice I could, to get her and the others back. I’m not sure why it didn’t take me.”

“Maybe you gave enough,” said Peter.

They sat together for a while longer, until he plucked the Soul Stone from Peter’s palm, and held it between two fingers. It wasn’t meant to be looked at. It wasn’t meant to be admired. It burned when he held it. It always burned, reminding him of what it cost. And maybe that was the ticket. He placed the Stone back in the center of his left palm. 

Tony stood up and offered his hand to Peter. They made their way back to the others, and Tony couldn’t help but put his arm around Peter’s shoulder as they walked side-by-side. 

~~

Epilogue 

On a beautiful sunny day at Avengers Headquarters. Tony tried to get Pepper’s attention. She turned her chair away from him while on a work call, signaling for him to leave, but since it was his office she was temporarily using, he felt he had some right.

He resorted to charades. But miming, “What time should I make dinner reservations for?” was trickier than he first assumed. 

He made her grin, though, so it was worth it. She ended her call, laughing. “Tony, I’m working here.”

“You’ve been working all morning. Take a break.”

She tilted her head, smiling in her way. He grasped her hand, letting his fingers slide up to the soft skin of her wrist. Resting against his desk, he pulled her from her seat and into his arms. She let him kiss her hand, then let him press his lips to the skin of her neck. “That tickles,” she giggled, but brought her arms around his neck. 

They were interrupted by a cough and knock at the door. Tony turned and saw Happy waiting in the doorway. “Come on,” cried Tony. “Did you not see we were in the middle of a thing?”

Happy gave him a face but turned to Pepper. “Car’s outside waiting.”

“Thank you, Happy,” said Pepper with a smile, turning to gather her suit jacket and handbag. 

“You’re leaving?” he asked. 

Pepper trailed a hand down his front, skimming over the chest piece, resting against his side. She kissed him. “Eight.”

“Huh?” he asked. 

“For dinner reservations. Eight p.m. I have meetings in the city until seven.”

“Oh. So you did understand what I was saying?” She laughed again, heading for the door, but he stopped her, pulling her into his arms. He whispered into her ear. “You know, I chose you.”

Her soft expression, her freckles, the way she bit her lip when she smiled, told him everything he needed to know. 

He let her go. Before Happy and Pepper left his office, Tony called out. “Hey, Hogan. You forgiven me yet?”

“Working on it,” replied Happy. 

Tony smiled, listening to Happy and Pepper’s voices receding down the hallway. 

He turned to gaze at the view outside his office window. He could see most of the compound from here. Wanda and Vision were out in the field going through training exercises, causing minor havoc between their two impressive sets of powers. 

He didn’t have a full roster for the Avengers yet, but he was working on it. Rogers refused the shield, stubborn bastard, even with the Accords de-ratified. Not that Tony was much surprised by that. He, Wilson, and Natasha remained in Wakanda with Thor and Bruce. It was the place to be, he guessed, and he couldn’t really blame them. They had been a solid team even before the Accords. 

Tony looked forward to seeing Steve’s face when he and the newly formed Avengers Governance Board officially offered the Captain America shield and position to James Buchanan Barnes. It was going to be worth it, just to see the shock on Steve’s face. 

“They’re here, boss,” said Friday, interrupting his thoughts. 

“Finally,” he said, exiting his office and winding his way down to the main concourse just as Peter Parker and his Aunt May entered the building. Peter carried a large duffel bag slung over his shoulder. He leaned close to May, pointing to various things, explaining what they were. Tony could tell May was indulging him. “Glad you could join us,” he said. 

They turned when he spoke, Peter giving him a shy smile. “Hey, Tony.”

“Hi, kid,” said Tony. He held out his hand for Peter to shake, but then he pulled him in for a hug. Peter bowed his head, and let Tony kiss his forehead, let him hold his face with his two hands before letting him go. “It’s good to see you.”

“Yeah,” said Peter, stammering a little. “I’m really happy to be here.” He gave May a quick glance. “Thank you. You know. For having me.”

Tony shook his head. “So, let me get this clear, you’re not turning me down again, are you?”

Peter grinned, a little embarrassed. “No. I want to do this.”

Tony studied him. He looked well rested, his cheeks rosy from the sun. Peter had expressed a desire to graduate with his class. With one year of high school left, Peter would split his time between Queens and the Avenger’s compound as the newest part-time Avenger. Then, if he wanted to go to college, they’d arrange things for that too.

He patted Peter’s arm, letting his hand linger. “Well then,” he said. He whistled and Dum-E rolled out, helpfully taking Peter’s duffel bag, before obediently rolling along behind them. “Why don’t I get this tour started?”

Tony indicated the way, and smiled at Peter’s glow of excitement.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr, where I mostly reblog things that make me laugh.
> 
> Please [ reblog](http://hafital.tumblr.com/post/181111707745/) if you're so inclined. Thank you for reading!


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